


Don't Close Your Eyes

by Mycreativewritings



Category: The Hobbit RPF
Genre: Abuse, Adam is his best friend, Aidan has a hard time trusting people, Dean is a waiter, Dean will do anything to help Aidan, Luke a journalist, M/M, Moving Away, Pain, Richard Owns a Restaurant, his father is abusive
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-22
Updated: 2015-04-26
Packaged: 2018-02-05 19:33:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 39,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1829665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mycreativewritings/pseuds/Mycreativewritings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They moved away from Ireland for a better start. A fresh start.<br/>He promised he would leave him alone. He promised he would try harder.</p><p>He failed.</p><p>All Aidan wants, is to be safe and free. He wants to get back to his only friend, to Adam. The only one who understands him. Now he is in the UK. Far away from home, with an abusive father who doesn't seem to be able to stop. </p><p>He was convinced he wouldn't be able to find other reasons to keep going since he wasn't close to Adam anymore. Along the way, he found four. With one in particular.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> _“Your conscience is the measure of the honesty of your selfishness._  
>  Listen to it carefully.” 

When you look through the eyes of a child, a whole new world opens up. The way they experience things are a lot different to what adults do in that exact same situation. Children are sensitive, they tend to take things a lot more serious than adults do. They remember everything, every memory is planted in their minds. The good memories will be put in the back of the head, but never will they be forgotten. Those good moments will be brought up again when a child is smiling, when a child feels like thinking about those times again.

The bad memories are a different story. Sometimes a bad memory is just temporary, such as a bruise or maybe a cut. They’ll be forgotten quite fast and sometimes they’ll laugh about it later. These are accidents, nothing serious. But sometimes, a bad memory is so bad, it will traumatize the child completely and shut them down.

They will never be forgotten nor put in the back of their heads. They’ll stay fresh in their minds and shine above everything else. All the good moments will be turning into nightmares when the bad times take over. They’ll rule over everything, they take away the smile from a child. They take away their happiness. They can ruin everything.

All your future plans, everything you wanted to do. It all vanishes in thin air. The bad memories will take those chances away. The bad people, who cause these memories, they will destroy the plans. The big dreams of a child, the bad people will turn them into nightmares.

These nightmares will haunt you down till the moment you die. Even when these people are gone, the memories will not ever leave your head. You won’t ever forget these people. And sometimes, when things are really turning bad, these bad people will stay in your life for as long as they like.

Even when you’re no child anymore, but a growing adult.

* * *

 

“It’ll be alright, Aidan. I promise.” Adam lays his hand on Aidan’s arm as he turns his head up to look at Aidan. He sees nothing but fear and sadness in Aidan’s eyes and waits patiently for him to answer. Adam has been friends with Aidan for a long, long time and knows his better than anyone else.

“A-Adam, I’m scared..” Aidan says, in barely a whisper. They are sitting on a bench, looking down on the truck that is about to bring Aidan and his father to their new home. A new town, a new life.

Another country. From Ireland to Great Britain. A move for a better start. Aidan and his father had faced some trouble and his father wanted nothing more than a fresh, new beginning. To simply start a life in a new and better place.

But there was no feast. Not for Aidan. This move means moving away from his safe place. From the only place where he feels protected and safe. In his 23 years, Aidan has never been somewhere outside of Ireland and he was nervous. The feeling in his stomach would not go away and it bothers him. He knows the move is not only for his sake. Not only for him and his father to start over.

It was to move away from those who know. Those who suspect something. Aidan knows about them. He gets strange, and often sympathetic, looks from his neighbours. From the locals. They know something is going on, but what? What, they do not know. They know nothing about his father. All they see, is a man, hiding his true identity from the world. Whenever he goes out, if he goes out, he wears nothing but a big overcoat, a head, heavy boots. His face ducked away in the collar of the coat. He was a mysterious man, never said a word, never bothered to even open his mouth.

And Aidan was frightened. Moving away from Ireland, it means moving away from Adam. His only friend, the only one who was kind enough to believe in him. To hang out with him. Adam doesn’t know about what’s going on, and Aidan wants to keep it that way. He doesn’t want to bother Adam with it and he’s scared for what will happen if he does.

Still, Adam gave him the comfort that he needed. He cheered him up, he did everything he could to let Aidan smile. He gave him the love he never got at home. Not after the accident that changed his whole life.

“What will happen in the UK? I-I have no one.” Aidan’s eyes fill with water and Adam tries to find words to tell his friend. There are none he could think of right at the spot so he just wraps his arms around Aidan’s taller body and gives his friend a tight hug. Aidan wraps his arms around Adam as well and buries his face in Adam’s neck. Adam lay one hand on Aidan’s back and with the other he runs his fingers through Aidan’s curls. The tears in Aidan’s eyes find their way to the world and start rolling down his cheeks.

“I promise you, Aidan. Everything will be fine.” Adam soothes and keeps his arms around Aidan. “B-But it won’t, Adam. I-It, it will only get worse. I know it.” Aidan hiccups and keeps his chin on Adam’s shoulder. The tears don’t stop streaming and Adam pulls away to look Aidan in the eyes. He feels bad for him. He feels very bad for him. All he wants, is for Aidan to be safe. He has no idea what is going on in Aidan’s life but he wants to know. Ever since the day he met him, Aidan has been this person who doesn’t open up and keeps things to himself. Aidan had a hard time trusting him but Adam managed to stick around long enough to win that trust.

And now, Aidan is his best friend. Just like he knows he is Aidan’s best mate.

“Aid, whatever will get worse, I promise it will get better. I know that for a fact. You will meet great people over there. People who will be there for you. Just like me.” Adam says, trying to find a bit of hope in Aidan’s eyes. He finds none. “There is no one like you, Adam. You are the only one who understands me. Everybody will think I’m a manic.” Aidan sniffs and hiccups again. He wipes away some tears, but new ones keep coming and it has no use.

“Oh, Aid. No one will ever think of you like that. Once you meet new people, you just need to get to know them better. Believe me, everyone will like you.” Adam says and wraps his arm around Aidan’s shoulder. Aidan doesn’t answer and Adam doesn’t push him. “Hey, and if they do, I’ll come around to give them a piece of their own mind.” Adam says, playfully pushing against Aidan’s arm. Aidan cracks a little smile and looks at the ground: “Can you promise that you will come around?”

He feels Adam’s hand on his back and looks up. Adam smiles at him and nods: “Of course I will swing by. You are my best friend, do you honestly think I would just let you go away like this? Aidan, I will visit as much as I can. I promise. You won’t get rid of me.” Aidan lets out a small giggle and Adam smiles. He gives Aidan a tight hug and says: “And never forget: whenever you are feeling low, sad or even alone, you can call me. FaceTime me, stalk me. Whatever you want. I’m here for you, alright? I will always be there for you.” Aidan looks at him and tears form again in his eyes all over again. Adam flies forward and hugs him again.

They stand up and Adam has to stand on his toes in order to hug Aidan properly. Aidan hugs back and hides his entire face in Adam’s neck. “I-I don’t want to leave you.” Aidan hiccups. Adam runs his hand over Aidan’s hair and whispers: “You’re not leaving me, Aidan. You won’t be alone in this. Whatever it is that you are going through, it is going to be hard. I know. But you won’t be facing these troubles alone. We are in this together, never forget that.” He feels Aidan’s tears fall on his shoulder and notices his own glasses are turning wet as well. He wraps his arms tighter, if that was even possible, around Aidan and buries his own face in Aidan’s neck. “I promise, I’m not leaving you. I’ll be there. In your mind, in your heart. I’m not leaving you. You won’t ever be alone.” Adam whispers and feels Aidan’s arms tighten around him. The man refuses to let go of him and Adam doesn’t want him to.

The sound of Aidan’s father’s voice breaks them apart again. Aidan’s head shots to the truck under the hill and the car in front of it. His father stands in front of the car, signing to Aidan and calling out for him.

It was time.

“I-I don’t want to go.” Aidan says, panic edging every word. “It’s alright, Aidan. You’ll be alright. Remember, every time it gets hard, call me. Alright? I won’t forget about you.” Adam whispers and gives him one last hug. When they pull apart again, Aidan looks at him: “And I won’t ever forget about you. I’ll miss you.” Adam softly smiles at him and lays his hand on Aidan’s shoulder: “I’ll miss you too, mate. This is not a goodbye.” Aidan gives him one last glare, nods and walks down the hill.

He turns around and sees Adam smiling at him. That smile that always gave him that one extra boost of confidence. It is probably the last time he would ever see it again. Aidan sniffs and waves at the smaller man. Adam waves back and sends him a nod. _It will be alright._

Aidan arrives at his car and looks at his father. The man looks back and says: “Son, this is the beginning of our new life. I promise, things will look up from now on.” He grins after saying that and Aidan knows nothing will get better.

Before he steps in the car, he looks up at the hill again. That bench is where he and Adam would talk. It was where he could cry, without telling Adam what was going on. It was where he and Adam shared good memories. Everything good was being taken away from him.

Adam sits on the bench and waves at him. Aidan bits his lip and waves back. He gets a nod and a smile from Adam and hopes for nothing but to see him again. He sends Adam a nod back and gets in the car. His father starts the engine and claps him on the shoulders. Aidan flinches and turns away. This wouldn’t change a thing. His father would still be the same man and Aidan, he would only get worse.

He hears the motor starting and stares out of the window of the big car. Adam is still sitting on the bench and stares at the two cars. Aidan feels the car moving and waves one last time at Adam. Adam waves back and stands up. Aidan keeps on looking at Adam until he is completely out of sight. He doesn’t turn away from the window and stares at the houses, the people, the trees, everything that is passing by. Everything he would not see again. Tears are rolling down his face as he shuts his eyes.

* * *

 

“Dean! Order for table two!” Richard yells from the kitchen as Dean gives the couple their plates: “There you go. Enjoy your meal.” They nod at him and Dean rushes back to the kitchen.

Richard holds two plates, filled with delicious food. Dean puts the notepad back in the pocket of his jeans and takes the plates from Richard. “These people still need to pay, so if you could do that as well, it’d be great.” “Alright. Are there still some orders left?” Dean asks as he finds balance between the plates. Richard turns around and goes through the papers on the big iron table. “Not right now. But I see some new people coming in, so your break has to wait, mate.” Richard grins and pushes Dean to the doors. Dean rolls his eyes and just sticks out his tongue to Richard. He walks through the flap doors and brings the order to table two.

“Here you go, ladies.” Dean serves the two plates and gets two smiles in return. He grabs his notepad and says: “I see you still need to pay.” “Oh, right. Alright, what will this cost us?” The older asks. “Together this will be 15 pounds and 60 pence.” Dean answers and watches how the lady grabs her purse. She pulls out a 20 pound note. She hands it to Dean and the Kiwi takes it. He gives her back her change and says: “Have a lovely meal, ladies.” “Thank you, young gentleman.” The other lady says and Dean smiles. He walks back to the counter and opens up the cash register. He puts the money in it and looks up when he hears the door opening.

A man walks in. A young man, about mid-twenties. He has a camera around his neck and a shoulder bag hanging on the side. He has a notepad in his hands and walks straight over to Dean.

“Hello, Dean. Busy working, I see?” the man says as he leans over the counter. “Not really what you would call busy, Luke.” Dean grins as he closes the cash register. “Is it really going that bad today?” Luke jokes as he sits down. “No, in fact, it is going very well. Dean is now just being a lazy ass.” Richard walks out of the kitchen, wiping his hands. Luke laughs and says: “Oh well. What else would you expect?” “I’m here, you know?” Dean bothers in, frowning. “We know.” Richard grins and pats him on the back. “Can I get you something?” he asks Luke. “A simple cola is enough for me today.” Luke says and Richard turns to Dean: “Go on, you heard the costumer.” Dean rolls his eyes and walks back to the kitchen.

Richard turns to Luke and asks: “Anything special happened to you today?” Luke shakes his head: “Na, the usual. I had to write an article about some lady with a cat who has two different eye colours. Mate, that looked just wrong. Wrong and sick. It was awesome.” Richard laughs. As a journalist, Luke has often quite some stories to tell.

Dean walks back in and hands Luke his cola: “That’ll be 1 pound, please.” “I know. There you go.” Luke gives Dean the money and the blond man puts in the cash register. “What did I hear? A cat with two different eye colours?” Dean walks back and gets a few glasses from Richard. “If you can clean these, than I can go back and do the rest of the dishes.” Richard says and Dean nods. Richard cleans his hands and pushes the flap doors open to enter the kitchen again.

“Yeah man, it was freaky. Blue and green. Man, you should have seen it! It looked so creepy, yet fascinated. About the only fascinated thing that happened this week.” Luke takes a sip from his cola and wipes his mouth. “That surprises me. London is always so full of life. Did really nothing happen over the week?” Dean asks as he wipes the glasses clean.

Luke nods his head and says: “They always say London is never boring. Well, when it comes to news, it is. People are so damn careful these days, no accident happens or such. The only exciting thing around here, are the shops and entertainment. But I’ve written enough of those stories already. I don’t write reviews, I write news. Proper news.” Luke sighs and Dean shrugs: “You could always write something about Richard’s restaurant. We sure can need some more publicity.” “I just told you, I don’t do reviews.” Luke says, lifting his head from the counter. “Not review wise, idiot. Yesterday, a squirrel ran in and stole all those small nuts from the kitchen.” Dean says, putting back the glasses. Luke bursts out in a fit of laughter and says: “What, really?! How come?” Dean shrugs: “I don’t know. I guess it’s because we are near a damn park. But anyway, can’t you write about that?” Luke thought about it for a moment and says: “I guess I could. Would you mind being my interviewee?” “Oh no, I won’t. But I need to get some work done. If you could wait for a moment, I’ll be right back.” Dean says, seeing Richard’s eyes warning him. Luke smirks: “That’s fine. I can wait.” 

* * *

 

Aidan looks up from the car at the house in front of him. They are a little outside London, which really doesn’t surprise him. He knows his father doesn’t want to be noticed in any way, meaning it would not be a smart move to move into the middle of busy and crowded London.

“Aidan, a new life lays ahead of us. A new world opens up. New possibilities, new chances. We will make it this time. It will all be better.” His father wraps his arm around Aidan’s neck and squeezes it. He grins at him and Aidan only wants to get out.

He waits for his father to get out of the car before he does it himself. He stands up to take a good look at the house. It isn’t large, yet it isn’t small. There is a big wooden fence around the big area. The ground they have is large. A long country lane next to the house, their only way to get to London.

The red tiles on the roof are reflecting the sun and the windows are clean. The path towards the door has big and small stones. There is a smaller roof above the door and Aidan spots a chimney.

 _Fuck. There is a possibility to make fire here._ Aidan looks at his father and sees him grinning. He tries to stay as far away as possible from the man, knowing that he sees the chimney as well. It only makes him more frightened. Because he knows that tonight he would not go to bed without at least one bruise.

As Aidan steps inside, he glares at his father. The man has already claimed one of the chairs and Aidan doesn’t bother telling him otherwise. “Hey, Aid. If you could be a nice lad and go up to your room. I need some peace and quiet.” His father calls out from his chair. “B-But-“If I need to repeat myself, you know what will happen.” The tone of his father’s voice turns darker and Aidan is quick with nodding. He doesn’t say anything and dashed upstairs.

He carefully looks in all the room till he finds his own. He walks inside and sits down on the bed. He looks around him and feels like crying. His life will turn into a living hell. Even fucking worse than it already is. No Adam to be help out, no neighbours to stare at his father so he’d stop, no nothing. He is alone and he hates it. He grabs his phone and searches for Adam’s number.

Adam is quick with answering and exclaims: “Aidan! Oh my god, mate! Have you arrived?” “Y-Yes, I have. I don’t like it, Adam. I really don’t. I-I want to go back to Ireland.” Aidan says in a silent voice, afraid his father would hear him. “Aidan, like I told you this morning, it will be alright. You trust me, don’t you?” Adam says, immediately bringing back the comfort that he needs. “I-I do, but I want to go back. I-I really don’t f-feel comfortable here.” Aidan says with a shaking voice, grabbing a nearby pillow. “Mate, you just got there. Give it a chance. It will be alright. I promise you. Believe me, it’ll be fine.” “I-I want to believe you, I really do. But I can’t.” “I know you are trying and I’m proud of you. Hang on to it, mate and it eventually will go the right way.” “I’m really not-“Trust me, Aidan. And if it really isn’t going well, you can always ask your father if you can move in with me.” Adam chuckles, hoping to cheer his friend up a little. “If I only could, I would have already done it.” Aidan sighs, sadness edging every word. “Mate, I-"

Aidan drops the phone when he hears his father yelling: “Goddamn it! Aidan! Get your rat arse down here! Now!” He grabs the phone and hisses: “I-I, I need to go, Adam.” “What was that noise on the background-“Don’t make me come and get you, boy!” “I really need to leave, Adam.” Aidan presses him away and drops his phone. He pushes himself up and with shaking legs, he walks downstairs, already knowing it has begun.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _I try to hide from his evil eyes  
>  I’m so afraid now I'm starting to cry_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've never been this fast with updating, consider yourself lucky;)
> 
>  
> 
> ***This chapter will contain descriptions of violence, just as a fair warning. It are just the flashbacks.***

“And what exactly was the damage?” Luke asks as he writes down everything Dean tells him. Richard is next to Dean, correcting him whenever needed. Which was a lot.

“It wasn’t much, to be honest. Just all the bags with nuts ripped apart and the kitchen was a bit of a mess.” Dean scratches behind his head, thinking back to that day. “A bit of a mess, you say. The kitchen looked like a bomb exploded. All the flour, all over the ground. Everything was turned upside down, all the food out of the cabins. That’s not just ‘a bit of a mess’.” Richard says, correcting Dean again. “Alright, alright. Whatever floats your boat.” Dean says, looking at Richard. The older man chuckles and Luke continues: “So, big mess, kitchen turned upside down. Got it. Did it take anything besides the nuts?” Richard thinks about that for a second before shaking his head: “That was all.”

“Alright, thanks, mates. I think I can work out a story with this.” Luke closes his notepad and puts it back in the bag. “You’re welcome, Luke.” Richard says and looks at his watch. He looks back at Dean and said: “It’s time to close up. Dean, if you can close the windows, I’ll get the keys to lock everything down.” Dean nods and Luke says: “I’ll be waiting outside.” He stands up and calmly walks out the door.

Dean walks over the big window and gets everything out of the sill. He brings it to the back of the restaurant and walks back to the window. He closes them up and waits for Richard to lock them down. “Tomorrow I need you here at 11 AM. It’s not going to busy, so you can come in later.” Richard says as he closes up the door. Dean smiles and says: “Alright. See you tomorrow then, Rich.” “Goodnight, Dean. Bye, Luke.” Richard waves at them and walks to his car.

Dean turns on his heels to face Luke and says: “Let’s go.” Luke nods and together with Dean, he walks back to their apartment block, not too far from Richard’s.

* * *

 

Aidan’s eyes flutter open and he looks up at the white ceiling. For a moment, he’s confused, not knowing where he is. He straightens up and looks around him. It then hits him and he remembers it all. The move, the goodbyes, Adam..

He yawns and flinches. He looks down on his arms and finds it is filled with new bruises. The beating from last night hasn’t been a mild one.

_~~_

_Aidan slowly steps inside the living room and find his father standing in the corner. His face says enough and Aidan wants to run away. He can’t and his father turns around. He walks over to Aidan and roughly grabs his arm: “You wanted a good life. I wanted to a fresh start. How the fuck is that possible if you fucking forget to bring that one good family picture we had? With your mother?!” Aidan curses inside. Fuck. He did. But he had been too busy with other stuff! He now sees the picture, lying on the ground, next to the bench on the hill. Fuck._

_“I-I’m sorry, father, I-“Don’t you lie to me, son. You know what happens when you do!” His father hits him in the face with a flat hand and grabs his arms tighter. Aidan can just feel the bruises forming under the tight grip. His father releases one arm and hits him again in face. “This is what happens to boys who are being bad! Like you!” His father raises an arm to hit him, but in that motion, he accidentally hits the glass behind him and knocks it off the sill. It shatters apart into a million little pieces on the ground and Aidan’s sees the look in his father’s eyes changing. They dart from Aidan to the glass. Aidan’s breath hitches as he desperately tries to break away from the man he calls his father. Whiles still holding Aidan, his father bends down and grabs one of the pieces. Aidan feels tears forming in his eyes and he pulls as hard as he can._

_It doesn’t work. His father’s eyes turn wild and he hisses: “No. **This** is what happens to boys who don’t listen.” “Please! N-No, please!” Aidan begs as the tears are now rolling down his cheek. His father laughs and says: “Are you really such a baby?” The glass comes closer to his body and Aidan feels panic rising in his chest. The next thing Aidan knows, is a blinding pain and the sound of his father’s laugh above it all. _

_~~_

Aidan pushes himself out of bed and looks for the bathroom. He hears his father sleeping in the next room and wants to keep it that way. He silently shuffles around, carefully checking every door but the one with the snoring noises. Eventually he finds the right one and he steps inside.

He turns his head to the mirror and he feels his eyes widen a bit. His hand goes up to his cheek and he slowly rubs the bruise. His face was black and blue. The cuts from the glass, those deep and painful cuts, they were visible from a mile away and Aidan notices the blood hasn’t completely dried yet. All the dried parts were sticking on his skin and some parts even in his black curls. He runs his hand over his face and leaves marks of the still wet blood behind. He looks at his fingers. The red colour scares him.

It always has and it won’t ever change. Aidan can’t understand why people would like red. It is the colour of danger, of terror. It is the colour of blood. Pain, hell. Nothing good. What good does red? Nothing.

He cleans his face with the cold water from the tap and looks up at his wet face again. The drops of water were rolling down his face and it relaxes him. It took away the blood, it took away a bit of the pain from the bruises.

He steps away from the sink and grabs a towel. He carefully runs it over his face, trying not to push too hard on the bruises. He fails and flinches several times. He puts it back and he looks at his arms. The bruises. They have the shape of his father’s hand. All around his upper arm. He sees the fingers, the exact shape. The purple and black was very much visible and Aidan feels the pain creeping back on the arm.

He shakes away those thoughts and steps out of the bathroom. He hears no snoring anymore. _Fuck, he’s awake_. Aidan knows what that means. He would walk down and meet up with his father at the dining table. His father would apologize to him. That’s what he always does. After every beat up. Alright, only after the bad ones. Like yesterday. His father would suddenly ask for forgiveness and Aidan doesn’t dare not to give it. He really doesn’t want to forgive his father and he never does. He tells him he does, but in reality, the hate for that man won’t go away. But just like every day, those apologies would be forgotten by the time they finish breakfast and the entire circle would start all over again. The circle of life.

The circle of his fucked up life.

And yes, of course. Aidan was right. As soon as he puts one footstep in the kitchen, his father looks up. Aidan doesn’t move and just stares at his father. The man puts away his newspaper and stares back at Aidan. He breaks the silence by sighing and he says: “Aidy, I am sorry for what happened yesterday. I got a bit out of control and fuck, why am I even doing this? I’m sorry. You are my son and I should treat you like one.” Aidan doesn’t say a word. He just doesn’t know how to reply to it. You always say this, always. You never keep that promise.

“I-It’s alright, f-father.” Aidan eventually stutters out. He shuffles closer to the table but backs away when his father stands up as well. The man walks over to him and wraps his arms around him. Aidan feels his strong arms press against all of the bruises and cuts and wants to scream and flinch. He doesn’t. He bites on his lip and feels his father’s breath creeping in his neck.

The man finally releases him again and lays his hand on one of Aidan’s new bruises: “It won’t happen again. I promise We moved here for chance and it will happen.” He whispers and puts a kiss on Aidan’s forehead. But instead of calming him down, the man only frightens Aidan more. His father promises him this every time. Every damn time and day. It never works. His father never keeps his promise. Never.

“It is the last time, Aidan. I promise you this, it won’t happen again.”

But it does. Every promise is forgotten by the end of their breakfast. And one time, when Aidan dared to remind him of it, he only got more beaten. Which is why Aidan is too afraid to speak up. He only speaks when his father allows him to. So he knows he says the right things. The things that won't anger him.

Aidan sits down and grabs a cup to pour in some tea. His father sits at the other end of the table, back to reading his newspaper. It was silent. Dead silent. They never spoke a word during their breakfasts. The silence is master during the beginning of the days and it always makes Aidan anxious. Who knows if his father suddenly gets an outburst, it will be loud and a lot more scarier. The last time Aidan had a proper breakfast was before the accident. It was when they were still a family.

~~

_“G-Get the child out! Get Aidan out of here!” “I give a damn about that brat! I need you more! You need to be safe!” Aidan’s father screams as he reaches out for his wife. The woman is trapped in a ring of fire. Their house is a sea of flames. Burning fire all around them._

_Aidan is at the other end of the room, scared as hell. He wants nothing but his mother. Maybe even his father. But more his mother. He sees her, she is far away, vaguely somewhere behind a sea of fire. As he looks around him, all he feels is heat. All he sees, are flams. All he feels, is pain. The fire is coming closer and closer and it has already burned a bit of his jeans._

_The little boy frantically looks up when he hears a scream. His mother. She is in pain. Where is his father? “MUM!” Aidan screams, now crying and full out panicking. He sees a figure coming closer and he begs for it to be his mother. “Mum? M-mum?” He is shaking and suddenly the face of his father appears._

_“DAD! Where is mum?” Aidan yells, reaching for him. “You killed her. You killed my wife!” his father screams, angry tears rolling down his face. Aidan’s body turns limp. “K-Killed? M-Mum is dead? I-I-I d-didn’t kill mum!” “You did! You had to be an ungrateful brat!” his father keeps on screaming and Aidan wants to back away. But if he does, he’ll be burned down to ash. His eyes dart up to his father and the man grabs him. He throws him over his shoulder and runs out of the building._

_Once they are outside, his father throws him on the ground and kicks him. Aidan cries out and starts crying. “That’s what you get! You killed my one and only love! Now you are an orphan! Is that what you wanted?!” “N-No!” Aidan cries as he holds his arm. His father turns red and he turns around. Aidan hiccups and follows the man with his eyes. They widen when he sees what his dad grabs. He crawls away, the tears only getting worse._

_His father walks back, a burning piece of wood in his hand. “D-Dad, p-p-please! W-What h-has g-g-gotten into you?!” Aidan stutters as he feels himself getting smaller. “Get used to it because this will be your punishment for ruining my life.” The fire comes closer and Aidan’s cries only get louder in the dark night._

~~

Aidan feels his eyes looking at his leg. The burn mark was still there and definitely not planning on leaving anytime soon. It is there to remind him of how terrible of a child he was. And still is. It reminds him of the day he lost his mother. Of the day he lost his hope in life.

“AIDAN! DAMN IT! ARE YOU DEAF?!” The thundering voice of his father rips him out of his thoughts and his head shots over to his father. “I-I’m sorry, f-father.” Aidan says, in barely a whisper, eyes fixed on the ground. “I was telling you how you are going out to find a job because we need the money.” His father folds up his newspaper and gets up. He walks over to Aidan and wraps his hand around his already bruised neck. He comes close and hisses: “If mister doesn’t have a job by the end of the day, things won’t be looking good for you. Am I understand?” “I have understand, father.” Aidan answered, not looking away. “Good. Get up and clean this mess. It’s disgusting.” “Yes, father.” His father hits him behind his head with his newspapers, laughs and reclaims his spot in the chair again.

Aidan sighs and stands up. He has to clean up his father’s mess. Again. When will there be a time he can have a peaceful day? Clearly never. He misses Adam. More than anything. It may have been just one day, but normally Adam would be there, standing outside the window. In the early mornings. It always made Aidan’s days a whole lot better. Now all he has, are the dead fish in the back of the room and the cat from the neighbours. He doesn’t even like that cat. It has kept him up all night with his noises. Not that Aidan was able to sleep. He never is, after a heavy beat up.

He cleans up all dishes and peaks at his father. The man is slumbered in the chair, beer in one hand, the TV remote in the other. Unbelievable. And shit. If Aidan doesn’t have a job by the end of the day, things will be looking far more worse. If his dad is drunk, he won’t be able to even think about going to sleep.

After 20 minutes, Aidan carefully walks back upstairs, to not disturb his father. He walks to his room and gets into some easy clothes. Clothes that cover up the entire lot. A sweater with long sleeves is enough to cover the big bruise on his chest and all the ones on his arms. A long pair of jeans makes sure his legs are fine and the knitted beanie he wears cover up enough of his face. If not, his sweater has got a hoody.

He walks downstairs and opens up the door that leads outside. It cracks and his father hears it. The man gets up and shuffles over to Aidan. Aidan turns around and gulps. The man presses him again the nearby wall and hisses: “You’ll find that damn job. You can work in as a cleaner for fuck’s sake. Like I care. But if you have no job, there won’t a pleasant time for you. Clear?” Aidan nods and chokes out: “L-loud a-a-and clear.” “Good. Now piss off. You already took away enough of my TV time.” The man pushes Aidan out of the door and he falls on the cold stones. He lets of a yelp, feeling the stones bump against his fresh bruises. His father snorts: “Pathetic baby.” He walks back inside and slams the door shut.

Aidan pushes himself up, but he falls back to the ground again. He tries again but fails. He flinches and yelps every time he falls back on the stones again and wants nothing but to cry. 

* * *

Dean is an early bird and already awake before dawn. A late start or not, Dean likes his days to be as long as possible. And what better way to do that than to start the day at 8 PM?

Dean eats his toast and watches the news at the same time. _Luke was right_ , Dean thinks as he watches how bored the reporter looks on the TV. There really is nothing going on in London. At least, nothing to be excited about.

He turns off the TV when he finishes his breakfast and cleans up his dishes. He changes his pyjamas for proper clothes and decides to go for a short walk. Just to clear the mind before work. He steps out of his apartment and sniffs at the fresh air. Well, fresh, not completely. The smoke from all the cars is in the air as well, but Dean was now used to it and counts it as fresh air as well. He puts on some music, puts his hands in his pockets and starts his little walking trip.

As he is walking, he hears a small yelp. He pulls out the earpiece and looks around him. Confusing is showing all over his face when he sees nobody. He wants to put back the earpiece when he hears that sound again. “What the hell..’” Dean mutters as he looks around him. In the corner of his eye, he catches something black and he turns around. He finds a man, curly haired man, trying to push himself from the ground but he fails every time. And every time he falls back to the ground, he lets out a yelp.

Dean pulls out the other earpiece as well and rushes over to the man. “Hey. Hey, do you need some help?” Dean asks when he arrives. He looks down on the man and sees him looking up. Dean smiles and offers him a hand: “Let me help you out.”

~~

Aidan looks up to find a man. A blond man, one hand in his pocket, the other stretched out to him. He gulps and tries desperately to get up himself. But once again, it won’t happen. But before he falls down to feel the pain again, the man actually grabs his hand just in time. Aidan looks up and his instinct tells him to pull away. However, the man offers him a comforting smile and Aidan lets him help him out.

Once he is back on his feet, Aidan pulls his hand away and slightly backs away as well, afraid the man might not like what he is doing. “T-Thanks f-for helping.” Aidan says, after realizing he still needed to apologize. The man smiles and says: “You’re welcome. Couldn’t really let you suffer any longer, could I?” _Suffer? I suffer enough every day._

Aidan wants to answer something, but doesn’t know what. “T-thanks again. I-I need to leave.” He stutters and turns on his heels to dash away. He feels ashamed of himself. The first person to actually talk to him, of course it had to happen with him being helpless. The man probably thinks the same about him like his father does. Because that’s what they all do.

~~

Dean doesn’t get a chance to say something back, the man is fast with walking away. With his hand still in the air, Dean watches as the man walks away. That was, odd. One way to describe it. Dean blinks a couple of times before turning around. There is something about that man but Dean couldn’t place it. He looks on his watch and sees it is nearly time for his shift.

He walks straight to Richard’s and opens up the door the restaurant. “Dean! Great, you’re here. You can start immediately, those people over there are hungry and I’m busy with other customers.” Richard throws him his black apron and rushes back into the kitchen. Dean smirks and grabs the notepad on the counter. He writes his name on top of it and walks over to the first customers of the day.

* * *

 

It is nearly 1 PM and Aidan already wants to give up. He had been looking all morning, but there was no job to find. Everything was full or they simply didn’t want to hire a clumsy, long Irish lad. He realizes he is thirsty but knows he can’t go home. Not now. His father will be furious.

He looks around him and spots a restaurant. He stands up, checks for cash in his pockets and walks over to the restaurant.

A little bell rings when he opens the door. It made him slightly jump and he quickly closes the door. He doesn’t want to sit down and decides to just walk straight over to the counter. He looks around him. It was quite a big restaurant. Colourful, yes. Colourful and big. The logo hangs above the counter. ‘Richard’s’ it says and Aidan figures this restaurant must be owned by a guy named Richard. Obviously.

“Hello, what can I get you today?” a voice says. A familiar voice. Aidan turns away from staring at the window and meets up with the same eyes from earlier today. He looks up and sees it is the man who helped him up.

“Hey! It’s you! What a coincidence!” the man exclaims and smiles. Aidan can’t help but crack a small smile back: “Hello.” He says and slightly blushes. The man smiles again and says: “You’re new here, aren’t you? I don’t believe I’ve seen you here before.” “N-No, t-that’s right. I-I-I moved here y-yesterday.” Aidan just wants the stuttering to stop, but he can’t help it. He can’t help but to be afraid around strange people. Strange, maybe even good looking, people.

“Aha, that explains it. Well, I figure that since we both live here, we might meet more often. My name is Dean.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the kudos and comments I've gotten by the way, they are highly appreciated:) xx


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _I hear the floor creek Closer and closer toward my bedroom door  
>  I try to stay quiet hiding under the covers  
>  Though I know he will find me_
> 
> (Source: http://www.bestteenpoems.com/poems/abuse/#OVbHA5RfvjEdi5XY.99)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am being way too harsh for Aidan...
> 
> **Involves violence and a bit of blood**

Aidan looks at the reached out hand. Dean seems like a nice lad, a nice man. And the smiles he had offered him are nearly as comforting as Adam’s. He has said nothing but good and warm words to him but Aidan just can’t trust the man. Not yet. Maybe. It is always the same case with people. They are sweet and nice to him in the beginning, but turn out to be just like his father and abandon him. It has broken Aidan’s trust in people and ruined a lot of friendships. It’s a miracle Adam is still around.

After a little hesitation, Aidan takes the hand and with a shaking voice, he says: “A-Aidan.” Dean shakes his hand and says: “Welcome to London, Aidan. Where are you from? Don’t ask me to guess, I suck at that. I’m not from the UK, hence my own accent.” Aidan is surprised by how spontaneous Dean actually is but he doesn’t want to tell him too much about himself. _Oh come on, telling him where you’re from can’t hurt._

Aidan takes a deep breath and says: “Ireland. I-I’m from Ireland.” “Ireland, jeez mate! You’re far away from home or am I mistaken? I think I’m mistaken. I’m from New Zealand.” Dean says as he rearranges the napkins on the counter. _That’s further away than Ireland, Dean_. Aidan thinks but doesn’t say it.

“Anyway, I’m sorry for rambling. What can I get you, Aidan?” Dean is now fully back focused on his job and Aidan silently sighs in relief. He was afraid Dean would keep on asking questions about things he’d rather not answer.

“Oh, eh, water is fine.” Aidan quickly answers. “Water? One the way.” Dean turns around and walks through flap doors, probably the kitchen.

Aidan turns around to close his eyes for a second. He can’t stay here too long, he needs to find a job. Before his father gets a chance to lay his hand on him again. But Aidan is afraid he might be here for a while. Dean sure seems like the person to start a happy conversation about everything. And Aidan is afraid he might hurt his feelings if he leaves sooner. I mean, that’s what happens all the time. Aidan has to listen to everything the people tell him, no interruptions. And maybe, deep inside, Aidan doesn’t quite mind having to listen to a good looking man.

_Wait, what?_

Aidan wants to reconsider that last bit when Dean comes back again. He gives him the bottle of water and says: “That will be one pound, please.” Aidan searches his pockets for money and hands Dean the cash. “Thank you very much, mate.” Dean smiles and puts away the money.

He joins Aidan again and says: “So, what do you think of London so far?” Aidan doesn’t open his bottle and says in a soft voice: “I’ve not been out that much since I got here.”

“Oh, really? Well, I’m happy you’re out now because look at the weather! If I were you, I would just go and enjoy the sun because that’s rare in the UK.” Dean says, starting to clean the counter. _Can’t really enjoy the weather if I’m frantically looking for a job_. Aidan thinks and he just nods at Dean.

“I’m stuck here, working all day. Luckily the sun shines inside the restaurant.” “I-I have to go again.” Aidan says, immediately wishing he hadn’t. Dean will be so angry at him.

_Shit._

But, instead of throwing a tantrum, Dean simply smiles and says: “Alright. Nice meeting you, Aidan. I hope I’ll see you around again. Have a lovely day!” Aidan can’t help but smile at Dean: “T-Thank you. Y-you too.” “Thanks, mate!” Dean says and nods at him. Aidan smiles back and walks out of the restaurant.

Once he is outside, Aidan has to take a few breaths before walking. That was the first person who talked to him in London. And surprisingly, and shockingly, that person was nice to him. Dean was really nice to him and Aidan doesn’t know how to feel about that. Should he be frightened? _Should I? Dean really doesn’t seem like the person to hurt me. Then again, so didn’t my teacher._ Aidan puts up his hoodie and walks off.

* * *

 

Dean bends a bit over the counter to see is Aidan was still there, but the man was gone. He sighs and pulls back.

There was so much that he wanted to ask, so much. Aidan was a weird guy. Well, weird was the wrong way to put it. He was a bit odd. Same meaning, Dean. He was mysterious. Yes, that’s the word he was looking for. There was this _mysterious_ vibe around Aidan and Dean simply can’t place it. Maybe the way he looks does something to his brain. Maybe, just maybe, Dean finds him a bit attractive. Just maybe. The curls were definitely standing out for him. And his length. He is taller than him, what if-

“Deano! Still on Earth? Snap out of it!” Richard’s voice interrupts his thoughts about Aidan and he shakes his head for a moment. “W-What?” he asks, a bit confused. He turns to Richard and the older man drops his hands next to his body, looking at Dean as if he was crazy: “Look ahead of you! There is a queue of people, waiting for you to help out!” “What?” Dean turns around and sees the long line of people.

It is taking too long for Richard’s liking and the man pushes Dean away: “Do I have to do everything myself here?” “Wha-that’s offensive!” Dean exclaims. “My apologies for the long wait, mister. Dean will help you out immediately.” Richard says and pushes Dean back: “Do your job, Dean, and stop dreaming.” Dean doesn’t answer, just simply sends the people an awkward smile: “What can I get you?”

* * *

 

“I’m sorry, sir, you don’t seem to be right for this job.” The woman behind the desk shoves Aidan his papers back and sits herself straight.

“B-but, you have to accept me! T-this is just cleaning!” Aidan tries, in a poor attempt of still getting the job. “Just cleaning you say? Mister, this isn’t just cleaning. Cleaning is a profession, it is a very important job and you need to do that right. Cleaning is the new top job! Lawyers, my ass!” the woman slams her fist on the table and Aidan feels himself jumping away in shock.

_What the fuck is wrong with that lady?_

“I-I-I should probably go..” Aidan gulps and rushes out the door. “Cleaners will be the new millionaires!” Aidan can hear her yell before he closes the door.

 _That lady is fucked up._ Obsessed with cleaning, that’s for sure. But Aidan doesn’t laugh about it. He looks up and sees the sun is setting.

Fuck. Fuck, fuck. The day is over. Everybody is going home now. He failed. He had found no job. Nobody seemed to be interested in him, nobody ever took the consideration of taking him. What is he going to do now? He would go home and accept the beating. That’s what. Because at home nothing else is waiting for him. Just a drunk father, who expects him to have a job. Now, a drunk father who has his fists ready.

Aidan wants to hide away in an alley. He doesn’t want to go home. He’s too scared. Too frightened. His father won’t be playing it nice. He definitely won’t. He will go mad. Absolutely mad. He will be furious, he will get ‘out of control’. He can already feel his father’s hand hitting his skin and his breaths are starting to shorten.

He’s afraid. He’s afraid of the world. Everything is turning against him. Aidan knows he has no other choice but going home. Still, he fears for what is about to happen and all he wants, is to go back to Ireland and Adam.

Adam.

Aidan quickly grabs his phone and dials Adam’s number.

Lucky for him, he is quick with answering. “Aid? Hey, mate. How are you doing?” Adam’s cheerful voice comes from the other end. “A-Adam..” Aidan stutters.

“Aidan? Aidan, what’s the matter? Did something happen?” Adam’s voice immediately turns to worry and Aidan hates that he’s the blame for that.

“A-Adam, I-I’m scared..” Aidan puts his back against the wall behind him and he slides down.

“Aidan, what happened? Did somebody hurt you?” Aidan can picture the way Adam looks right now. Big eyes, panicked look on his face.

“N-No, b-but they are a-about to..” Aidan’s breaths hitches as he tries to hold back the tears. Never has he ever been this scared. He always knows about the upcoming beatings. But this one, his father had made clear this would be a beating to remember. Because if he doesn’t have a job, they have no money. And if they have no money, they have no chance of living a proper life.

“Who?! Who’s about to hurt you? Aidan?” Adam’s voice is very panicky and Aidan wants nothing but for Adam to be less worried.

“A-Adam, I-I can’t tell you who. I-I really c-can’t.” Aidan whispers, feeling the tears in his eyes. “Why not, mate?” Adam’s voice is soft and the man doesn’t snap or yell at Aidan. “B-Because..” Aidan doesn’t come further and starts sobbing.

“It’s alright, Aid. You don’t have to tell me. But please tell me you’re alright. Please, Aidan. You are scaring me.” Adam says.

“I-I’m sorry, A-Adam.” Aidan sobs. “Don’t apologize, Aidan. You can’t help it. But please tell me you’re safe. Is somebody after you?” Aidan sniffs and wipes away the snot from under his nose: “I-I j-just feel someone will hurt me today..” Aidan hears a sigh of relief from the other end of the line: “Mate, I thought someone was really after you! Aidan, please, please don’t panic. Everything is fine. There is nobody after you, you are safe.”

“C-Can you p-promise me that?” Aidan whispers. “I promise you that, Aidan. You are safe and sound. Are you alright?” Aidan nods and then realizes Adam doesn’t see that so he says: “I-I think I-I a-am..” He could just hear the smile from the other end: “That’s good to hear. Aid, I’m really sorry, but I need to go. I have dinner with my parents. But you know you can always call me, do you? I could just-“N-No, don’t. G-go to that dinner. D-don’t worry about me.”

“You know I will worry about you. Especially after this call. Don’ t tell me to stop worrying about you, because I won’t.” Adam says and Aidan realizes he really misses the stubborn lad. “You can call me when you need me.” Adam says.

Aidan doesn’t answer fast, creating a small silence between the two. “Okay?” Adam asks, just to be sure. “O-Okay.” Aidan eventually answers. “Great. Now, go home and go to bed, mate. I think you need your sleep. Get a good rest and make tomorrow the best day ever. Alright?” Adam says. “Alright.” Aidan answers. “Good. Hey, goodnight, Aid. And call me when you need me. Later, mate.” “Bye, Adam.”

Adam ends the call and Aidan feels slightly better. It was good to hear his voice again. Adam always knows how to calm him down and how the cheer him up. Still, his father was waiting for him to get home and he figures he really has no other choice. He feels something wet on his face and looks up.

Great. Rain. This day can’t get any better than this. Aidan puts his hands in his pockets and rushes home. For as far rushing was possible.

* * *

 

“So, not a good day today, I suppose?” Luke asks as he sits down at the table. Dean takes a spoonful of food and swallows it. He says: “I wandered off one time today. Just one time, Luke. Nothing too bad.”

“Nothing too bad, you say. I know you long enough to know that’s not true. You wandering off with your thoughts can be dangerous.” Luke says, grinning as he takes a sip from his water.“What’s that supposed to mean?” Dean drops his spoon next to his plate and looks at Luke.

“And usually it takes longer than an hour.” Luke says, ignoring Dean’s small outburst. “When I start daydreaming, it’s because, well, because..” Dean starts moving around with his fist as he tries to find words to say. “Because why?” Luke teases. “Because reasons, Luke. There are always reasons for it.”

“And what was the reason today?” Luke asks, looking at Dean. “None of your concern.” Dean answers, maybe a bit too quick. Luke narrows his eyes and starts grinning: “It’s something I’m not allowed to know, is it?” “Can we stop talking about it?” Dean turns red, though he doesn’t want to.

“Is it maybe a _someone_ rather than a something?” Luke asks, staring rather hopeful at Dean. “I’m going to ignore you ever said that.” Dean says, stubbornly. “It is!” Luke exclaims. “I want the ground to swallow me up.” Dean mutters as he tries to stop the blushing.

But he can’t help it. That Aidan may have been a weird, no, mysterious, guy, he was good looking. Good looking in a rather wide term.

“Extra! Extra! Dean O’Gorman has got a secret lover who goes by the name off..” Luke raises his hands as if he is out on the streets, selling newspapers and looks at Dean, waiting for him to drop the name.

Dean sighs and figures he might as well tell him. “Aidan. His name is Aidan.”

“Who goes by the name of Aidan! We are curious to see the first romantic pictures of the lovely couple and keep you updated.” Luke winks when he finishes that sentence and Dean slaps his hand against his forehead: “Can’t you ever stop being a jerk?” “It’s in my genes.” Luke grins. “Just to be clear, Luke, Aidan and I just met. Literally just met. We are not a couple nor shall we ever be.” Dean says and Luke hears slight disappointment dripping from his voice.

“Don’t be so sure about that. I highly doubt this Aidan-figure will be able to resist you.” Luke says and Dean rolls his eyes. “You think? First glimpse he got of me, was me in my easiest and simplest clothes. I looked horrible.” Dean says. “How come you only met him just today? Everybody here in London has been to Richard’s.” Luke asks, checking his phone for the time.

“He moved from Ireland to the UK. Just yesterday.” Dean answers. “Ireland? So I recon his accent is really thick?” Dean nods: “Suppose so.” “Nothing in comparison to your high voice.” Luke teases. “Can you knock it off?! What’s wrong with you today?” Dean exclaims, getting annoyed with Luke’s constant teasing.

Luke just laughs and says: “You are just so teasable today.” “That’s not even a fucking word, Luke.” Dean sighs, looking at him like he is crazy. “Making it up as I go along, Deano. I’m creating my own dictionary.” “I wanted to share an apartment with Luke. And what do I get? A workaholic who can’t seem to stop creating non existing words.” Dean stares at Luke and rolls his eyes. “Hey! It’s part of the job!” Luke exclaims, in his defence. “What? Talking nonsense to your readers?” Dean says, now being the one to tease. “Oi, it’s not nonsense. It’s called humour.” “Rather dry humour than, Luke.” Dean grins and ducks away for Luke throwing a piece of carrot at him: “Shut your mouth, loverboy.” “Don’t call me that.” Dean snaps. “You deserve it, idiot.” Luke shrugs and Dean just sighs.

* * *

 

Aidan is shaking when he arrives home. Not only because he’s so cold from all the pouring rain, he’s is shitting his pants. He knows it’s about to get really bad for him but he is really not willing to face all the pain. He doesn’t want to feel the pain. He just wants it to stop.

Every damn time. Every damn day, he’s scared to go home. All the other people, happily going home. They can’t wait to get home. He? He can’t wait to leave. If he is lucky enough to be allowed to leave.

With a trembling hand, Aidan pushes the door open. It is unlocked, which only frightens Aidan more. His father usually locks the door, but if he doesn’t, it means he wants Aidan to be inside quick. And that’s never a good sign. Especially not today.

Aidan silently steps inside and closes the door. He pulls off his wet jacket and feels the rain dripping from his forehead.

He wants to dash upstairs, but he hears the floor cracking. Heavy footsteps are coming closer. Aidan’s breath becomes short and he frantically looks around to find a place to hide. The cracking noises become louder and louder and slowly but surely, Aidan starts to recognize the sound of a filled bottle. A beer bottle.

Shit. Shit is all Aidan can think about now. His father, the man is drunk. _No, please. No, not today. God, have mercy with me!_

“Well, well, well. Look who decided to show up.” Aidan’s eyes widen and he looks to the door opening. The cracking has stopped and his father stands in front of him, bottle slumbering in one hand.

“I-I..” Aidan stutters, now really not able to speak. “So, dear son of mine, what can I call you from today on? A cleaner? A builder? A lawyer?” his father takes a big sip from his beer and wipes away the liquid from his face.

“I-I- F-father…” Aidan steps back and his father only comes closer. “You have found a job, haven’t you?” his father is now dangerously close and Aidan looks down and up again, too afraid to look the man in his eyes.

“Look at me when I speak to you! Are you telling me you haven’t found work?” Aidan doesn’t dare to open up his mouth. And there it happens. His father raises his free hand and slaps Aidan in his face. Aidan’s head turns to the left and blood spats out of his mouth.

“You pathetic, pathetic brat! Can’t you do anything?!” his father yells as he keeps on hitting Aidan. The younger man falls to the ground and his father raises his bottle to hit him with that. Aidan moves his hand in front of his face in order to protect himself from getting more hurt.

But it does not help. The bottle snaps apart after the first hit and it ends up with Aidan having glass all over his hand and a piece in his leg. The rest, it lays shattered over the ground. Aidan looks up and his father is hovered above him, furiousness all in his eyes: “Where the fucking hell did you even find the nerve to come home after this disaster?!” He now kicks him and roughly lifts him from the ground.

He presses him up against the wall and hits him in his face more and more. Aidan now starts to cry and his father drops him again. He spits in Aidan’s face and says: “You make me feel ashamed to be a father.” Aidan whimpers and tries to make himself as small as possible.

His father grabs his arms and yanks him from the ground. He drags his injured son to the basement and opens up the door. He throws Aidan inside and snaps: “You spend the night in here, prick. And don’t you even think of going back to your room for the next couple of months. You deserve this, Aidan. You didn’t listen to me, which you always should. You should know better by now. Clearly you are too stupid to even remember that.”

His father grabs a pillow and throws it at Aidan. He snorts and closes the door with a loud bang, leaving Aidan behind in the dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Same as always, comment if you liked and thanks for all the kudos! :D xx


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Trapped in my head, trying to escape memories of a life I once had.Fear of confronting my worst pain, fear of face to face that day I'm sure to go insane._
> 
>  
> 
> (Source: http://www.bestteenpoems.com/poems/abuse/#9MEwC1HsXxtJYAdG.99)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally the next chapter, yeah! I hope you will enjoy it:) It's still not looking good for Aidan, though...

It is cold and dark. The sound of something buzzing in the background is very loud and it makes Aidan very anxious. The dim light of a light bulb on a loose treat is his only source of light. Still, it is very dark and he is crying.

The pain is overwhelming. The piece of glass is still in his leg and his hand is bleeding. The back of his head is hurting like hell and his face feels swollen. He is sure he has broken something. He doesn’t know what, but he is convinced there is.

But not only the pain is too overwhelming. It’s everything. He is feeling so broken down and depressed. He feels actually nothing. His body is limp. He just wants his father to control his anger or at least try his upper best not to hurt him anymore. Because now he only throwing out promises while he really isn’t.

Aidan clutches himself to the pillow and lets his tears fall on the soft fabric. He slowly falls to his side and tries to fall asleep, tears slowly slipping down his face as he sniffs.

* * *

 

Dean and Luke are sitting in front of the TV, watching a movie. It was a terrible movie, but Richard’s boyfriend Lee was in it and they wanted to see how good his acting was. It was actually pretty good. Though the movie itself was horrible. But maybe that is because Dean doesn’t like movies with shiny vampires.

“Honestly though, what kind of vampire has got a shiny chest?” Dean asks as he points to the man on the screen. Luke snorted: “The Twilight vampires have.” “I’m pretty sure I haven’t seen Lee with a shiny chest yet.” Dean says, sinking further away in the couch.

“You know you don’t have to watch this, do you?” Luke turns his body to the slumbered form next to him and frowns. “I’m going to watch through this for Lee. And Richard.” Dean answers stubbornly and sits himself straight again. Luke sighs and rolls his eyes: “You do whatever you want.”

“And by the way, why has this Edward person got such a pale skin and Lee doesn’t? This does not make any sense at all.” Dean says, not stopping complaining.

“Jesus Christ, Dean!”

* * *

It was dawn. The sun breaks through the clouds and the moon makes its place for the bright ball of golden light. Birds are waking up and mist is forming a layer over the roads. People are waking up to start a new day again.

Aidan’s eyes flutter open when a bright light crosses his eyes. He feels something warm and slowly turns his head. A ray of sun was shining through the small window of the basement and falls upon his body on the cold ground.

Aidan turns to his back and looks up at the dirty ceiling. The light bulb from last night had burnt out, just at the moment he had woken up. It was utterly dark for the rest of the night but Aidan couldn’t care less. That small bit of light hadn’t even helped him out.

He hears the chirping of birds somewhere far away and moves his hand in front of his eyes to prevent the sun from shining in his eyes. He slowly pushes himself up and groans when he feels all the bruises and cuts burning as he moves. His hand was still red from all the blood and the cuts in his legs aren’t any better. He inspects the rest of his body and finds ‘just’ bruises from the beating he had gotten.

Aidan tries pushing himself up with his good hand and after a couple of minutes, he succeeds. He looks down on the pillow he had used for that night and sighs. It has got dried up stains of water on it, the result of his crying. And he has to use this pillow for the next couple of months as well as his father won’t provide him from a clean one.

He looks at the door and realizes there is no way out until his father decides to open the door. Which will take long as it is weekend now and his father won’t be out of bed before 1 PM. That means Aidan won’t get something to eat until that time. And his phone. His phone lays on the counter next to the door that leads to the basement.

“Fuck..” Aidan groans as he runs his hand through his hair. He walks up to the door and rests his forehead against the wooden material. He closes his eyes and feels his lips trembling. He puts his fist against the door and moves his head to look at the stone and hard ground. He wants nothing but to slam his head a few times against the door but he knows that will wake up his father and make things worse. Besides, Aidan doesn’t want to make his injures worse than they already are.

Aidan moves his head away from the door again and turns around. He walks to the wall and slides down with his back against it. He pulls his knees close to his chest and wraps his arms around his legs. He buries his head into his arms and makes himself as small as possible, trying not to think about food.

* * *

“Wake up, Dean! It’s a beautiful day! Don’t be lazy!”

Dean’s eyes fly open when a pillow flies against his head. He falls back into his own pillow and curses: “What the fuck?!” He moves himself up again and keeps on eye shut as he rubs his head. Luke is standing in the door opening, holding another pillow.

“Oh no, Luke. Don’t. I swear to God, Luke, don’t-” Dean isn’t able to finish that sentence as another pillow is thrown across the room and hits him right in the face again. “Luke! Damn it!” Dean shouts as he throws the two pillows back at his flatmate. Luke evades the pillows and laughs.

Dean swings his legs next to his bed and rubs his eyes. He keeps on hand on his matrass and looks at the time. 9.30 AM. “What the hell, Luke?! It’s fucking Saturday, I’m supposed to be sleeping!” Dean groans as he pushes himself back on his feet.

“Dreaming about Aidan, that’s what you mean.” Luke grins and ducks away for Dean’s hand. “Shut your face, Luke. You just woke me up, don’t expect me to be all happy today.” “Oh, are we grumpy?” Luke teases and sticks his tongue out to Dean. The Kiwi rolls his eyes and Luke winks at him before walking off to the kitchen.

Dean follows him with shuffling feet and sits down at the table. He sees Luke has already made tea and stands up to grab a cup.

“But for real, did you dream about Aidan?” Luke joins him and grabs a mug for his coffee. Dean grabs the cup and says: “For the hundredth time, I only met him yesterday.” “It’s possible, mate.” Luke says and sits back at the table. “Possible, but not true.” Dean says as he shoves his chair away to sit down again.

“Or you just won’t admit it.” Luke says and pours in the coffee. “Why are you so interested in Aidan anyway? You haven’t even met him.” Dean says and reaches for the tea can. “No, but since I know you are interested in him, then so am I. This might be a potential relationship, Dean. Just think about it.” Luke shrugs and takes a sip from his coffee. “No, it might not. Aidan barely spoke a word to me. He is nice and all that, but I do not see how we could get a relationship. And fuck, why are we even talking about this?” Dean shakes his head and grabs the remote to turn it on the news.

Luke grins: “Na, I think you’ve found your prince Charming. If I only knew what he looks like, it would be better.” Dean sighs and turns to Luke: “We are stopping right now and focus on our breakfast, alright?” Luke snorts: “Alright. Whatever you say, mum.” Dean rolls his eyes and turns his body to the TV. “How the fuck am I supposed to keep track on that rule if you don’t even follow it yourself?!”

* * *

Aidan has no idea how long he had been in the basement but he suddenly hears noises coming from the hallway. His head snaps up and he looks at the door. He hears the sound of something breaking and is now fully awake. The shuffling noises come closer and he hears muffled curses. He hears rattling at the doorknob and after a few seconds, it cracks open, letting in an immense amount of light.

His father steps inside and searches the room for Aidan. When he spots him, he moves his hands, gesturing at Aidan to get up. Aidan doesn’t dare to disobey and with the good hand, he slowly pushes himself up.

Apparently too slow as his father yanks him up himself. Aidan flinches and wants to scream, but his father’s eyes say enough. Aidan bits his lip to prevent himself from screaming.

“Food is ready, son. And when you’re done eating, can you clean up the vase I dropped?” Aidan nods with a shaking head and his father lets go of him again. For some odd reason, he wipes away dust from Aidan’s chest and sends him a somewhat awkward nod: “When you’re clean you can come, alright?” “Yes, father.” “Good lad.” His father claps him on the back and leaves the basement again, this time leaving the door open.

Aidan takes a deep breath and rubs his arm. Of course the man had to grab him on his bruises. Why not? He wipes away all of the dirt, takes another deep breath and walks out of the basement, softly closing the door behind him.

He looks to his left and sees the blue vase shattered into small pieces on the ground. He flinches, thinking back to yesterday when pieces like that went through his flesh. He shakes away that thought and walks over to the kitchen.

He finds his father in the exact same spot as the day they arrived. Sitting at the head of the table, with his newspaper. Aidan sits down at the table and doesn’t move. His father looks over the newspaper and nods at him: “Go on, eat, Aidan.” Aidan nods back at the man and grabs a piece of toast. He carefully starts eating and the entire routine of a silent breakfast starts all over again.

* * *

Dean puts on his leather jacket and grabs his red beanie. As it is Saturday, he and Luke are going to meet up with Richard and Lee today to grab some food and slumber through London together.

“Hey Deano, if you’re done, can we leave?” Luke calls out from the living room, being already done. Dean mouths Luke’s words and rolls his eyes. He puts his beanie on and walks back to the living room.

“If you can hand me my phone, we are ready to go.” “Great.” Luke throws Dean’s phone at him and stands up. Dean puts his phone in his pocket and grabs the keys of their apartment. Luke grabs his phone as well and opens the door to leave. Dean walks backwards to check everything one last time and turns around to follow Luke outside. He locks the door, puts the keys in his pocket and dashes after Luke.

* * *

“Hey guys, good to see you.” Lee greets as he gives Luke a hug. Dean shakes Richard’s hand and Lee gives him a hug as well. “Good to see you too, Lee.” Dean smiles and so does Lee.

“Have you watched the movie?” Richard asks when Lee lets go of Dean again and goes standing next to Richard. Richard wraps his arm around Lee’s shoulders and looks at Luke and Dean.

“What movie? God, Richard! You have not send them that movie, have you?!” Lee exclaims shocked as he turns his head to Richard. Richard just grins awkwardly at him and Lee’s eyes widen: “Richard! You bastard!” Dean and Luke chuckle and Luke says: “Don’t mind it, Lee. It was a, ehem, good movie.” Lee sighs: “You don’t have to lie to me, Luke. I know it’s terrible.” “Oh, I’m not lying. It’d be more Dean, to be honest. He was complaining throughout the entire movie. Not about you, but about this Edward person.” Luke says, getting an elbow in his rib from Dean. Lee just sighs and shakes his head. Richard smiles and gives Lee a kiss.

Dean watches the pair and imagines him and Aidan standing there. Him holding Aidan the way Richard holds Lee. Kissing his soft lips, keeping him safe from the world. Luke notices him staring and grins. He leans closer to his ear and whispers: “Can you just imagine Aidan holding you like that?” Dean lets out a squeak and slightly jumps. Richard and Lee pull apart and look at Dean. “Are you alright?” Richard asks. Dean blinks a couple of times before nodding: “I’m fine.” He shots a deadly glare at Luke, who can’t stop laughing. “Prick.” Dean mutters and hits him in his stomach. “Shall we just go? I’m hungry.” Richard says, getting Lee to roll his eyes. Dean and Luke grin and the four of them walk into the centre of London.

* * *

Aidan has just finished his breakfast and is now cleaning the pieces of glass. They are sharp and Aidan is deadly afraid that he will cut himself. He carefully wipes them away and stands up to throw them into the bin.

That’s when his father drops into the hallway and walks over to him. Aidan freezes right on the spot and feels his father’s hand on his shoulder. He gulps and his father says: “Throw that away and get your jacket. You and I are going to find you a good job as you are too shit to do it yourself. Hurry up, I want to be back home before the match starts.” Aidan is quick with nodding and his father pushes him a bit as he gets his hand off Aidan’s shoulder.

Aidan shudders and throws away the glass. He gets himself over to grab his jacket and grabs his beanie as well, to cover up as many bruises as he possibly can. He grabs the fingerless gloves and puts them on. He hears his father showing up behind him and he turns his head away. His father is already wearing his enormous coat and hat and opens the door. “Out.” He says to Aidan and Aidan keeps his head down as he steps out of the house. They have no car so they ought to walk to the centre of London.

Aidan hates this. He hates this so much. He has to walk all the way to London, with his father very close to him the entire time. And no doubt the man will hit him in public. He will do it without anyone seeing it, but still. He will do it and Aidan is scared.

“We are going to all those places that denied you and demand them to hire you. Denied at cleaning, Jesus Lord. Even a weakling like you can clean toilets.” His father mutters as he keeps his head hidden in the collar of his coat.

Aidan doesn’t answer. He just keeps on walking behind his father, not daring to stand next to the man. He looks at the ground and bits his lip. He is pretty sure his lip will split at some point if he keeps on biting on them.

“And let me do the talking. Of course your rambling ruined all of it. Dare to speak up and you’re in trouble. Am I clear?” His father turns his head around and Aidan nods. He dares to look up though and spots the Big Ben. They have arrived at the centre of London.

His father stops for a moment and so does Aidan. The man looks around him as this is the first time stepping out into the big world, out of his house. The Big Ben starts making noise and lets Aidan know it is now 12 o’clock.

His father comes standing next to him and Aidan tries hard not to cringe, just so people wouldn’t notice something.

“Show me that damn cleaning organization. I want to have a good word with them.” His father demands and Aidan is quick with pointing to his left: “I-It’s t-that way.” “Good. Get on with the walking.” His father pushes him towards the direction he points at and Aidan stumbles away.

* * *

Dean, Luke, Richard and Lee are sitting on a bench, in front of the Big Ben. It was a little past 12 o’clock and they had picked up some sandwiches from a shop nearby.

“This is actually pretty good.” Dean says as he takes another bite from his sandwich. “Are you going to cheat on me?” Richard looks at him and Dean chuckles: “Don’t worry, Richard. Your sandwiches are still the best.” “They better be.” Richard snorts and gets a glare from Lee: “Stop it, Richard.” “Sorry, babe.” Richard pecks his lips but Lee doesn’t give him a kiss. When he sees Richard’s face, Lee sighs and gives him a kiss on his cheek.

Dean wants to take another bite when all of a sudden he spots a familiar face across the street. He looks up from his sandwich and recognises the man as Aidan. He swallows the piece he has in his mouth and stares at Aidan. He had forgotten how beautiful he actually was.

“Is that Aidan, Dean?” “What?” Dean snaps out of his trance and sees Luke grinning at him. Dean doesn’t answer but it is enough for Luke. “He is, isn’t he?” “Oh, shut your face, Luke.” Dean groans, but turns his head to Aidan, who stands on the other side of the road.

“Who is what?” Lee bothers in. “Dean’s little crush.” Luke says and Dean sighs frustrated. “Oh? I had no idea you like someone!” Lee exclaims and looks at Dean. “I don’t-well, not really.” Dean stutters and gives up. “You do!” Lee says and smiles. “And I suppose it’s that man over there?” Richard points to Aidan and Dean nods. “I have to say, mate, not bad. Not bad at all.” Luke rubs his chin as he looks at Aidan. “Don’t get ideas, Luke.” Dean groans. “Already getting possessive? And he isn’t even yours yet.” Luke grins and Dean wants to shout at him.

He doesn’t and turns back to Aidan. He can't help it but wave at Aidan. Aidan looks at him in what looks like shock but after some hesitation, Aidan carefully waves back, sending him a little smile as well. Dean feels his knees starting to weak and doesn't have a clue of what is going on. He smiles back at Aidan and wants to get up to go and talk to him when all of a sudden a man steps out of the building Aidan is standing in front of.

He doesn't look happy. In fact, the man looks furious. Dean looks at Aidan and sees his face had turned frightened. That smile he just offered him, it had completely disappeared. Dean starts to get confused and looks back at the man. He looks extremely pissed off and turns to Aidan. Aidan backs away a bit, but the man grabs his arm and pulls him close to him. He hisses something in Aidan's face and Aidan stutters something back before the man lets go of him again. Aidan carefully looks at Dean and doesn't say anything. He does raise his hand to wave again, but the man doesn't let him. He gives Dean a look, pulls Aidan's hand down and pushes him to walk in front of him. Aidan doesn't disobey and is quick with listening to the man.

Dean stares in a bit of shock at how the man pushes Aidan away and turns his head back. He has no idea what he just saw. What the hell was that all?


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _I can't turn this around_  
>  I keep running into walls that I can't break down  
> I said I just wander around  
> With my eyes wide shut because of you  
> 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, this took me longer than I expected. But here we are again, next chapter. I'm sorry for any mistakes, I'm a bit tired. This must be the worst chapter I've written:/

It’s funny how sometimes you barely know a person, spoken one or twice, yet you feel so attached to them. You feel worried when you see them in pain or scared, even though you know so little about them.

Dean watches as the man who just pushed Aidan so roughly, pulls him along with him whiles looking around him like a deer in front of a car. Aidan turns his head around to look at Dean again and sends him a small and insecure smile. Dean cracks a small smile as well, though he feels so reason to smile. Aidan looks very uncomfortable and even scared. That worries Dean. He just wants to see Aidan more so he has got the chance to talk to him, build up a friendship.

“What was that all about?” Dean hears Luke asking. He lets out a deep sigh and falls back against the back of the bench. He is wondering the same thing as him. Who was that man? What was he to Aidan? Why did Aidan look so frightened?

“Deano? You okay?” Luke’s voice rips him out of his thoughts and he drops his shoulders. “I’m sorry, that just caught me off guard for a second.” Dean apologizes as he turns his body to look at the others again. “What, you mean that man dragging Aidan away?” Lee asks. Richard has his arm still wrapped around him and looks at Dean as well.

“You know what, never mind. Let’s just go, okay?” Dean stands up and sends them a bit of a forced smile. They frown but decide not to go on about it. They stand up and walk after Dean, who was already across the street.

* * *

 

Aidan knows he’s in trouble. He knows there is an upcoming storm. This wasn’t supposed to happen. That handsome lad from the restaurant wasn’t supposed to be there. Why did, Dean? Yes, Dean. Why did Dean even wave at him? Did he really make that good of an impression? Aidan was pretty sure Dean didn’t want to see him again. Or at least not start a friendship.

Yet, Dean waved at him and whether Aidan wants it or not, it felt damn good to know someone is out there, willing to be his friend. But how can he start a friendship when his father is about to ruin it all? But hell, when doesn’t he?

Aidan feels his father’s hands creeping on his shoulder, holding on very, very tightly. Aidan feels his bones cracking and squeezes his eyes shut for a second. He bites on his lip and starts looking around him, hoping no one looks at them.

No one does.

They stop in the middle of a busy street and his father turns Aidan’s body around to face him. Aidan feels like running away but can’t. His feet are glued to the stones and he stares at his father, not daring to look somewhere else.

His father grabs his chin and forces Aidan to look him directly in the eye. Aidan feels his knees weaken, trying to get away from the that only hurts.

“Who the hell was that man? How come he waved at you? _Fucking_ waved at you? Who is he? Are you trying to do that thing we don’t want to happen?”

All the questions are coming at him like a big splash of water and Aidan doesn’t want to answer them, afraid he might get Dean into trouble. Even though he barely knows Dean. Besides that he’s from New Zealand and sucks at Geography.

“I-I… He’s, h-he’s, I-I m-met h-h-him at a r-restaurant.” Aidan stutters in a hustled voice, afraid people will hear him. His eyes are like the ones from a wild animal, about to be shot. A scared puppy.

“What restaurant?” his father asks, keeping Aidan’s eyes on him. “A-a r-r-restaurant d-downtown.” Aidan stutters, now deadly scared his father will look up Dean. Which was the last he wants to happen. Dean will get hurt and for some reason Aidan is worried about him.

“I fucking mean the name, you rat! That’s about as useful as tits on a bull!” his father yells, now turning heads. People are staring at him with wide eyes and one woman is shaking her head in disbelief.

Aidan is starting to feel closed in. People are staring and looking at them, they have stopped walking, big eyes are staring holes in him. His breathing is starting to fasten and his father looks at the people. The man handles fast. He looks away from them as fast as he can and grabs Aidan’s arm. He drags him out of the street, into an alley.

His father slams him against a wall and hisses: “I want the truth and I want it now. Or your little boyfriend will get hurt, you fag.”

Aidan flinches at that word. Fag. He isn’t a fag. He isn’t. He just happens to like Dea-boy-people. He doesn’t even know it anymore.

“H-He’s j-just s-someone I-I talked to, f-for a s-short m-moment.” Aidan stutters. “Tell me his name now and I won’t beat you up so bad.” His father hisses and Aidan gulps: “D-D-Dean..”

“Dean? Jesus Christ, you are falling for a Dean. This can’t get any worse. Now you listen to me, boy. You are not going to get close with this ‘Dean’, am I clear? You might start plotting something with him but you won’t escape me. You won’t! Do you understand, prick? Do I see you with blondie again, he will be the one to get hurt. And he will hate you forever. Is that what you want?”

The words of his father slam in like thunder in the night. This can’t be happening. Dean is the first person to actually talk to him and Aidan wants to get to know him better. He actually wants it. That’s that the normal standards with him, but Dean is just so different and nice and Aidan wants to be his friend. And he has this feeling Dean wants to be his friend as well. Though, he is not so sure about that.

But if his friendship with Dean means Dean getting hurt, than he just doesn’t know it anymore. He so badly wants to be friends with Dean, he so badly wants to fit in and have a group of people to care about him.

But he doesn’t want his father to lay a hand on Dean, he doesn’t want to find Dean, covered in bruises. He doesn’t want to find Dean’s friends, angry about the fact their friend got hurt because of him. Because of course Dean has got friends to protect him. And Aidan, he doesn’t. Dean needs to be safe, even if it means staying away from him. “Am I clear, idiot?”

The voice of his father brings him back on Earth and he is quick with nodding: “Y-Yes, f-father.” His father taps him on his cheek and says: “Good boy. Now, we are going to find a job for your poor ass so I can pay the fucking bills. Come on.”

* * *

 

Dean feels the eyes of his friends burning in his back and turns around. They stop walking and Dean asks: “Something wrong?” Luke steps forward and says: “We’re a bit worried about you. Ever since that little thing with Aidan earlier today, you seem a bit, off. Are you alright? Do we need to check on him to calm down your nerves?”

“Fuck no. I’m not off, I’m not nervous. No need to be worried about me, lads. Really. Can we just go on? Your staring, that’s what makes me sweat.” Dean says, crossing his arms. “Are you sure?” Richard asks. “A 100 percent.” Dean assures him, though he isn’t quite sure himself. Maybe he is a little worried about Aidan. What if that man is now doing something worse to Aidan? Does he even know the man? Maybe that man just grabbed Aidan, him not even knowing him.

Oh great, now he is even more worried about Aidan.

“Alright, that’s it. You are worried about him and not even so little.” Lee speaks up, shaking Dean out of his thoughts. Yet again. “What?” Dean starts laughing in a nervous way. “Yes, you are.” Lee walks over to him and pushes him forward: “You are going to look for Aidan and check if he’s okay. You are going to have a proper conversation with him.”

“W-wait, what? I’m sure Aidan doesn’t want to, he’s as shy as a baby sloth! And we don’t even know each other that well!” Dean exclaims, putting his feet steady, trying to stop Lee from pushing him.

“Don’t even care, Deano. You are the only one who knows him and you have a nice little chat with him, didn’t you? You are going after him, now.” Lee says and let’s go of Dean.

Richard and Luke are trying to keep their laughs to themselves, Richard having one arm around his stomach and one hand on his mouth, Luke hanging on to him.

“Alright, alright! I’ll go! But, wait, what about you guys?” Dean turns to Lee one more time and Richard says: “Don’t mind us, mate. You need to make sure your future boyfriend is alright.” “I barely know the guy!” Dean exclaims. He rolls his eyes, turns around and runs into the direction of Aidan.

* * *

 

Aidan is sitting on a bench in front of a big building. His dad is inside, trying to get him a job. He had demanded Aidan to stay on that bench and not follow him. Because he would only ruin it.

He stares into nothing. The sky is blue and a cloud shoves in front of the sun. He feels a tear rolling down his cheek and is quick with wiping it away. He can’t cry. He needs to stay strong. For his mother. For himself. For Dean.

It was like speaking, or more thinking, of the devil. A shadow covers him all of a sudden and Aidan feels his skin get cold. He gulps and dares to look up. He feels his eyes widen when he sees the person standing in front of him. No. This can’t be happening. Not now. This goes all the wrong way.

Dean. Dean is actually here.

Aidan turns his head to the doors of the building and back at Dean. Dean seems a bit out of breath and has to calm down for a bit before he says: “Hey, Aidan, right? I’m sorry, I just saw you across the street and you looked a bit uncomfortable. And since I know you and stuff, I got a bit worried.”

Worried? Dean was worried for him. The first person in ages to get worried about him.

“W-Worried? Y-You were worried about me?” Aidan dares to speak up. Dean nods and looks at the space next to Aidan: “Mind if I sit down next to you?” Aidan wants to say yes, but he doesn’t. He nods a bit off guard and Dean takes his place next to him. He looks at Aidan and asks: “Are you alright? I just need to know that.”

Aidan swallows away a lump in his throat and looks at his shoes before he says: “I-I’m f-fine.” “Who was that man, if I may ask?” Dean tries to find something in Aidan’s eyes, but he sees nothing but emptiness.

“I-I, h-he, eh, he-“It’s fine. You don’t have to tell me. I just needed to make sure you aren’t hurt or anything. You aren’t, right?” Aidan shakes his head, even if his heart is screaming for help.

Dean sighs in relief and says: “Good. Eh, how did it go with finding a job? Have you found one?” “N-No. Nothing.” Aidan answers, eyes keep on darting at the door.

“Oh. Well, I will keep an eye out for possible things. Maybe there is a spot free in the restaurant, I don’t know.” Dean says, smiling at Aidan. Aidan cracks a smile back and just wants to have Dean’s comforting smile around forever.

“You should come around more often, Aidan. It’d be nice to see your face around. Or we can just hang out at some place at some times. You know, like real friends do.”

Friends? He and Dean, they are really friends? Aidan feels his heart make a jump at that word. He’s got a friend, a proper friend!

No. No, Aidan. If you befriend Dean, he’ll get hurt. You can’t let that happen.

Aidan gulps and Dean sees he’s getting unconformable. “Or we can take things a bit slower, if you like. I mean, we just know each other. You know what, I’ll give you my number, you can decide whether to message me or not. It’ll be cool if you did.” Dean quickly scrabbles his number on a paper he finds on the ground and hands it to Aidan. Aidan takes it with shaking hands and looks at the numbers on the paper. He looks up at Dean and sees he’s about to say something.

But Aidan hears the sound of automatic doors opening. His head shots to the door and he sees his father walking out. He turns back to Dean and doesn’t know what to do.

Dean sees the panic in Aidan’s eyes and follows them. He sees the man too and looks back at Aidan. Aidan looks at him and it even looks like he is pleading him to leave. Dean doesn’t want to leave. What if that man is about to hurt Aidan again? But Aidan’s eyes say enough. He is begging him to go. Dean doesn’t have a choice. And against his will, he stands up: “Well, it was great talking to you, mate. Call me whenever you feel like talking, alright? See you around, Aidan.”

Aidan watches as Dean walks away, hands in his pockets, looking back at him. Dean sends him a smile and Aidan can’t do anything but smile back.

He turns his head back to his father, who fortunately doesn’t see Dean. At least, not anymore. Aidan stands up as soon as his father is next to him. He is looking pissed as hell and grabs Aidan’s arm. “We are going home. This shit hole of a town hasn’t even got the guts to hire you. I know enough.” His father is even more pissed off that Aidan thought and he feels his father pulling him along, back home.

* * *

 

It is evening in London and Luke and Dean are sitting on their soft, big red couch. Luke is watching TV and Dean is playing with his phone. Or more, waiting for Aidan to call him. Well, waiting. More hoping. He is sure it will take Aidan forever to call him but he doesn’t mind it. Not too much. Aidan is very shy and he seems rather uncomfortable with it. But that’s okay. Dean is not about to give up. He will show Aidan he wants to be his friend because it seems Aidan has got some bad experiences with it.

He looks at his screen once again and only finds a notice from a stupid game he had downloaded in like the stone age. He lets out a deep breath and puts his phone next to him.

Luke looks away from the TV and with the remote loosely hanging in his hand, he asks: “Dean, are you alright? It’s not about Aidan right?” Dean sighs: “Maybe it is. I just don’t know what to do to get him to understand I won’t do anything to him.”

Luke sighs and turns the TV on mute. “Listen, mate, to me it seems like Aidan needs time to adjust to people. To new places. He just got here. I think he just misses his mates back in Ireland. I think he was kind of caught off guard with that creep around.” Dean says nothing and just stares at the moving motions on the TV screen.

“Hey, don’t worry about it. You basically ran after him to check if he was okay. And you had a bit of a friendly conversation with him. I’m pretty sure he understands you won’t hurt his feelings.” Luke says and moves his head to Dean.

“I know, but still. When I met him the first time, he was the same.” Dean says. “Aidan is shy, Dean. That’s all. Very shy, clearly, but still. And I think you know perfectly well how to handle that kind of thing. He will come around, he just needs time.” Luke says. Dean sighs and cracks a smile: “Thanks, Luke.” Luke smiles: “No worries, mate. And don’t fucking wait for him to call you. That means you are desperate for him. But you aren’t. He will call. Eventually. Maybe. I don’t know. But don’t wait for it to happen. Alright?” Dean rolls his eyes and smiles: “I won’t.”

“Good. Now, let’s focus back on Laura having her baby.” Luke says and turns the sound up again.Dean rolls his eyes, smirks and slumbers back into the couch.

* * *

 

Aidan is sat in the corner of the basement. His father wasn’t joking when he said Aidan would have to stay in the basement for a while. He basically had thrown Aidan inside as soon as they had finished their dinner.

He stares at his phone and at the paper in his hand. Dean’s number. He wants to send something to him, he wants it so badly. But his father can’t find out about it. He really, really can’t. And it would be the first time for Aidan to do something against his father.

No, he can’t risk it. He can’t let Dean get hurt and he doesn’t want to know what his father will do to him when he finds out. But Dean seemed so, so, so sure of himself. He seemed like that man who can handle things himself. He doesn’t need anyone to look and watch out for him.

Aidan looks up when he hears footsteps, cracking the wooden floor. His father is heading up to bed. Aidan looks up at the time on his phone and his eyes widen again. Fuck. He should be sleeping right now.

He jumps up, leaving the number laying in the corner and sprints to the only pillow in the cold room. He lays down and crawls up into a ball, to keep himself warm. A bright light suddenly joins the basement and he sees his father looking around. Once he sees Aidan, crawled up in the corner with a pillow, he huffs and closes the door again with a loud bang, letting darkness take over again.

Aidan lets out a deep breath and from his spot, he stares at the paper in the far back. His eyes dart up to the door and he waits for it to be complete silent. Once he is sure his father won’t hear him, he stands up and walks up to the paper. He bends down and looks at it. He sighs and takes it with him as he walks back to his ‘bed’. He lays down again, feels a tear roll down his face, sniffs and closes his eyes to let darkness let take over completely.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the long wait. I have no excuses really. Every time I wanted to start, I got stuck. And every time I was going on the right track, I had to go somewhere with my family. I'm sorry.
> 
> On the plus side, this has to be my longest chapter yet. But that's specially for you guys, to hopefully make up to the long wait. 
> 
> And a massive, massive thank you to all of you who are reading and commenting and leaving kudos and everything! I have never gotten so many hits and kudos and I appreciate every single one of you! I love you and I hope you enjoy this next chapter:) This finally involves Aidan wrapped in a blanket and Dean being the big teddy bear that he is:)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _You fascinated me_  
>  Cloaked in shadows and secrecy  
> The beauty of a broken angel

It is pitch dark in Dean and Luke’s apartment. Empty pizza boxes and cola cans are still laying all over the place. The blanket in which Dean had been wrapped for the entire night is laying half on the couch and has got a few tomato sauce stains on it. Luke’s little notepad lies on the other couch and is turned upside down.

There is still one light on in the entire apartment. A small, vague light. A small glow filled the room and a small bit of the hallway.

Dean is sat in bed, the little light on next to him. He is staring at his phone. He doesn’t know why, but he just waits. He really waits for Aidan to call or send him a text. He doesn’t understand why he is even bothering waiting. He knows Aidan won’t make a first move. He hasn’t known him for a very long time. Heck, their conversation hadn’t been longer than 10 minutes. But he knows enough to see Aidan is a very shy and rather closed up person. Aidan is not the type to just laugh at everything you say. No, Dean is very happy he managed to get him to even crack a small, very small, smile. That is enough for him.

He sighs and wants to put his phone on the night stand to go to sleep when all of a sudden the display lights up. Hope rises up in his chest and he answers the phone: “Hello?” “Go to sleep, Dean. That damn lamp of you is fucking bugging my beauty sleep.” Luke’s moaning comes from the other end and Dean rolls his eyes and lets out a sigh.

“I know you just rolled your eyes, mate. Just for God’s sake, do it and go to sleep.” Luke groans and Dean sighs again: “Fine. I’ll do it. Are you even too lazy to just get up and tell me?” “Fuck off. I won’t leave this comfort for you.” “Cheers, mate.” “Goodnight, Dean.”

Dean chuckles when Luke presses away and he puts his phone on the night stand. He turns off the light and goes laying on his back. He stares up the ceiling and can’t get Aidan off his mind. He is just so, so, well, how to put it? So complicated. And Dean wants to figure him out. He wants to figure the problem out because it is quite clear to Dean that Aidan in fact does have a problem. And Dean wants to help him.

He stares up the ceiling once again and feels his eyelids getting heavier till the point he has fallen asleep. 

* * *

 

Aidan is sat at the kitchen table, alone. The sun is letting her rays fall on the wooden table and provide Aidan from a bit of warmth. The big open window in the kitchen allows the sun to let in the light. He has put his bowl of cereal aside and stares at the device in his hand.

All night, Aidan had been doubting about whether to call or message Dean or not. On one hand, Aidan really wants to. Dean is a nice guy, for a far as their interactions go, and Aidan hates it when he lets people down. But, on the other hand, his father has forbidden him to even look at Dean. And Aidan rather listens to him, he doesn’t want to face the consequences. And on top of that, Dean is high probably very angry at him for even daring to call after waiting so long.

Aidan looks at the little piece of paper on his left and carefully, afraid he might rip it apart, he picks it up and holds it a bit closer to his face. He switches his glares from the paper to his phone up until the moment he reaches out for his phone. He clicks on ‘Add New Contact’ and moves his eyes to the little paper.

After waiting for what seems like hours, Aidan carefully presses the first number that belongs to Dean’s phone number. He waits a moment before pressing the other number. And another. He looks at the paper one last time. 6. He only has to press in the 6 in order to finish Dean’s number. He puts his thumb on the number but just when he wants to press it, he hears a loud crash.

His entire body feels the shock and he jumps up from his chair. He falls back and feels his heart pumping like crazy. He turns around, leaving his phone and the paper for dead. He cringes when he hears his father’s voice above everything. He is cursing like there is no tomorrow and Aidan wants nothing but run out of the house. He carefully stands up and walks as slow as he possibly can towards the room where all the noises are coming from. His phone is still lying on the table.

He carefully walks up to the living room and peeks his head around the door opening. His father is throwing plates at the ground, kicking against everything he sees. Now he has got a little statue in his hand, the one Aidan had got from his mother, shortly before she had died. Aidan feels his eyes grow wide and before he knows it, he exclaims: “NO!” It’s too late. His father throws the little angel at the ground and it snaps apart in a million little pieces. Aidan’s eyes fill with tears as he blankly stares at the pieces that once formed his precious angel.

His father stares at him before hissing in a dark voice: “Out. Aidan, out before I might kill you..” Aidan stumbles backwards and stares at his father with frightened eyes. “OUT I SAID!” his father screams. Without any hesitation, Aidan turns on his heels and dashes out the door.

He nearly falls whiles running out the house, but manages to keep himself steady. He looks around him and decides it is best for him to stay away from the house for the rest of the day, even though the day has just started.

He lets his arms fall next to his body and drops his shoulders. He doesn’t know what has gotten into his father and he doesn’t know what to do now. Because if this will occur more often, Aidan won’t be able to keep on running.

He glares back at the door and hears his father still throwing things around and yelling at the top of his lungs. He physically jumps at the sound of glass breaking and shots his head towards their window. A big hole in the middle, with a book lying on the ground, surrounded by pieces of glass. Aidan sneaks to the book and picks it up. He dashes away from the window again and looks at it. It is a picture book, which contains photos of him, his mother and father. When they were still a happy family. He can’t find the courage to open the book again and places it on the stairs. He walks backwards before turning around to run away from his house.

* * *

“Where are you going? Day off, remember?” Luke looks up from the TV when he hears Dean grabbing his jacket.

Dean looks up at him and frowns: “I have a dog, remember? Batman needs to take a teeny tiny wee.” Luke rolls his eyes at the words ‘teeny tiny’ and snickers: “Right. Well then, go on before he pees on my carpet.” “Excuse you? We share this apartment. Nothing here belongs to you. Except for the stuff in your room.” Dean snaps, tying the lease around his dog. “Whatever.” Luke mumbles before focusing back on the TV.

Dean stands up and says: “I’ll be back in an hour. Later, mate.” “Later.” Luke waves his hand carelessly in the air and Dean chuckles. He opens up the door and lets Batman wait before he steps out. He closes up again and lets Batman pull him along.

-

“Don’t lick that! Batman..” Dean moans as Batman starts licking the dried up poop from another dog. He gives up after trying to pull him away for multiple times and turns his body around. He feels a drop of water on top of his head and he looks up. He holds up his hand and starts feeling more drops falling down. He sighs frustrated and turns back to the dog: “Great. Rain.” Batman looks up at Dean’s voice and focuses back on the poop. He does rip away from it when he starts feeling water on his fur as well. Dean pulls Batman away from it and clutches his jacket closer around him.

* * *

Aidan pulls his jacket closer around him as he walks through the calm streets of London. It was quite windy but Aidan doesn’t mind. He has to empty his mind from the events that just happened and fresh air was highly needed right now. But, as he thinks back about it, he feels himself tear up. His father has gone mental, totally crazy. Everything that Aidan had gotten from his mother, his father had either tore it apart or destroyed in another way.

Aidan looks up at the sky and sees its starting to darken. He looks back and the tears find their way out to the world. They start rolling down his cheeks and he starts running forward.

At one point he just can’t keep it together anymore and he falls forward, on his knees. The rain starts pouring down out of the sky and Aidan is crying. His knees are hurting and he places his hands on the pavement. His wet hair falls in front of his face and the tears fall on the stones as well. His jacket doesn’t provide him from enough warmth, but right now, Aidan doesn’t care. Nothing goes right in his life. Even the weather is working against him.

-

Dean holds the lease very tightly as he runs back to his apartment. Batman is soaking wet and so is he himself. He feels the water creeping underneath his jacket and curses inside. He starts running faster but stops dead in his tracks when he spots something in the back of his eye. He steps a few steps back and looks across the street. His eyes widen and his bottom lip falls open a bit.

There, in the pouring rain, with a shaking body on the ground, is Aidan. He isn’t standing up but his shoulders are shaking and Dean can swear he is crying. Without any more hesitation, Dean pulls Batman along as he races across the road. He dashes over to Aidan and crunches down.

Aidan’s head snaps up and Dean feels his heart stop for a moment. Aidan is indeed crying. His eyes are red and puffed and there is snot on his face. His hair is dripping in front of his face and his eyes are dull and empty.

Aidan clearly wants to move away, but Dean stops him by placing his hand on his Aidan’s shoulder: “M-mate? What’s the matter? You are not all right, I, I.. Come on, I need to get you, well, us, inside before a storm hits us.” Dean wraps his free arm around Aidan’s shoulders and doesn’t allow Aidan to move away.

“I-I c-c-can’t! I-I’d b-be a b-burden t-t-to you!” Aidan stutters, shaking because of the strong and cold wind. Dean only tightens his arm around him and says: “You won’t. And if I leave you here on the cold ground, in this rain, I’d be a terrible friend. You need to warm up a bit.” “N-no, b-but-” “Really, Aidan. It is all right.” He turns to his dog and says: “Come on, we need to get inside.” Aidan struggles a bit, but gives up after he realises Dean won’t let go.

* * *

Aidan feels his heart pumping in his chest. He feels everything but comfortable by going home with Dean. He will probably be a burden and nothing but a waste of time. Just like his father always tells him.

But right now, Aidan has nowhere to go. His father has thrown him out and it won’t be safe to return home before late tonight. So, he decides to give up the fighting and just go along with Dean. Yet, the feeling in his stomach won’t go away and he still has got the tension in his body. Dean’s dog is pulling the lease, not wanting to go so slow.

Aidan looks at Dean and stutters: “G-go. G-go without m-me. I-I c-can s-survive. A-and your d-dog is already t-tired of m-me. H-he wants to go home.” Dean sends him a short glare before pulling his dog back: “It doesn’t matter, mate. Batman just hates the rain, that’s all. But you can’t really go any faster, so we won’t. Besides, we are there.” Aidan looks up at the building and lets Dean pull him through the doors.

Once they are inside, Batman starts shaking out all the water and Dean runs his hands through his hair. Aidan doesn’t move. He only starts shuddering and sees his jacket has soaked through.

Dean sees it as well and gently takes Aidan’s arm: “You are cold. Come on, we need to go this way.” He guides him and the dog towards a staircase and goes first. Aidan hesitantly follows him and hears the dog already running in front of the shorter man.

Dean stops in front of a door and takes out the keys, who are wet as well. The dog starts scratching against the door with his paw and Dean is quick with opening the door. Batman dashes inside and Dean opens it a bit further. “Come inside my palace.” Dean lightly chuckles but Aidan just looks at him, sending him a very weak little smile.

He carefully steps inside, rubbing with his right hand over his left arm. He is still as wet as can be and he still feels himself very cold. The dried up tears on his face don’t help either and the rain is kind of burning in those red and puffed eyes.

Dean closes the door and takes off his jacket. “Here, give me yours. I’ll get you something to warm up.” Aidan hesitantly takes off his jacket and Dean takes it over. “If you walk through that door, you’ll get to the living room. You can go, if you want. But if you rather wait here, that’s fine by me too.” Aidan looks at the ground, too shy to give Dean a straight up answer. Dean seems to understand the message and just smiles at him. He lightly pats him on his shoulder and says: “Hey, it’s okay. You don’t have to go. Just wait here and I’ll go with you once I’m back.” Aidan moves one corner of his mouth, as an attempt to thank Dean. Dean walks into another direction and Aidan suddenly feels very disorientated.

He looks around the hallway and sees a couple of pictures. Most of them are of Dean, his dog and another guy. Aidan looks around him a couple of times, just to make sure Dean isn’t there, and he slowly makes his way over to the photos. He looks at them and sees the guy making an appearance in most of the photographs. They are clearly friends. Aidan thinks as he looks at the picture of Dean and the guy pulling weird faces.

“Cool, aren’t they?”

Aidan jumps up at the sudden voice and turns his head around. The guy from the pictures stands right in front of him. He has a coffee mug in one hand and the other is stuffed into the pocket of his jeans.

Aidan gulps and the man notices his discomfort: “Did I scare you? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to. I heard Dean talking so I wondered to whom. My name is Luke by the way.” Aidan presses his lips together as the man stares at him. Luke’s eyes start to fill with a bit of confusion after Aidan hasn’t said anything back: “I-is something wrong?”

Luckily for Aidan, Dean just walks in with a couple of blankets. He walks over to the two and stands next to Aidan: “I see you met Luke than. Luke, this is Aidan.” Luke moves his head as he starts grinning at Dean: “Well well, Aidan. Nice to finally meet you in person.” Aidan looks at Dean in confusion and Dean shots Luke a deadly glare. He turns back to Aidan and says: “Don’t mind him. He is an idiot. Let’s just go to the living room.” Dean shots Luke another deadly glare as he walks in front of Aidan. Aidan moves his eyes to the ground as he walks past Luke. The man only chuckles and rolls his eyes.

“There you go.” Dean shows Aidan the couch. Aidan looks at it and Dean looks up: “You can sit down.” “I-I’ll make your couch wet.” Aidan says in a silent voice, looking at the clean blue couch. Dean chuckles: “Doesn’t matter. I can dry it, can’t I? Really, just sit down.”

Aidan carefully steps forward and after looking at Dean a couple of times, he dares to sit down. He places his hands on the soft couch and looks down.

Dean walks around the couch and wraps the blanket in his hands around Aidan. The Irishman looks up and Dean sees confusion in his eyes. The Kiwi smiles at him and whispers: “Need to warm up, Aidan. I’ll make some tea and I’ll be right back. And don’t be scared of Batman, he doesn’t harm a fly.” Dean looks up and spots his dog observing Aidan from a safe distance. “Bat, don’t act stupid.” Dean says, rolling his eyes at the little dog.

Aidan turns his head to Batman and bits his lip. He turns back and sees Dean walking out the room. Aidan sighs and without acknowledging it, he wraps the blanket tighter around him. It is a fussy blanket and it certainly does its job right. Aidan feels himself warming up but he is confused. Why is Dean helping him? There must be a reason behind it. He isn’t just helping him because he wants to. Nobody has ever done it. Only his mother. When he was little. But Dean? Well, now he thinks about it, Dean has been absolutely nothing but nice to him. His father-

 _Shit. Dad. He will be furious! He’ll hurt Dean!_ Thoughts suddenly fly through his head. His father will kill him and hurt Dean afterwards. Aidan feels panic rising in his chest and he wants to grab his phone. He feels everywhere, but then he realises he has left his phone on the kitchen table. Whiles typing in Dean’s number. Aidan curses from inside and wants to jump up and tell Dean he is all warmed up and ready to go home again. He finds himself stuck on the couch. He doesn’t actually want to leave. Even though he’d rather has only Dean around, he finally feels warmed up and he actually finds it a bit cosy around here.And that funny fluttering feeling in his stomach won't leave either.

He moves his head to the dog and sees Batman standing up. The dog walks over to him and starts sniffing him. Aidan wants to move away but takes a deep breath. He looks away from the animal and waits for him to bit him. But Batman doesn’t. When Aidan dares to look back, the dog is staring at him and sits down. Aidan carefully reaches out his hand and gently strokes the dog. Batman seemly enjoys it and let’s Aidan do what he is doing.

-

In the meanwhile, Dean is warming up water for the tea. He feels slightly accomplished. He managed to get Aidan to come along with him, instead of staying out in the rain, crying and all cold. Dean wants to know what’s going on because the thought of Aidan and his problem has only gotten bigger and much more complicated. Aidan crying had broken his heart and he wants nothing but to cheer up Aidan and make him feel loved. Or at least like he has got a friend.

“So, we just decided to bring Aidan home?” Dean turns away from the kettle and sees Luke leaning against the door opening with his annoying mug.

Dean frowns and says: “How can I not? I found him on the streets, in the pouring rain. He was crying, Luke. Crying. His eyes were all red and stuff. He could have caught a cold and what kind of friend would I be to leave him just like that?” “A horrible one.” Luke says and places his mug back on the counter.

“Indeed. Luke, be gentle with him, would you? Aidan is terribly shy and I think he is going through a lot right now. He is a very closed up person, I’d say. So don’t go out and keep on asking questions. He really has trouble handling that.” Dean says as he picks up the kettle. Luke nods: “I understand. I just noticed, yeah. Alright, I won’t cause any trouble.” “Thank you.” Dean sighs in relief and pours the water into the teapot.

“May I have some tea as well, mate?” Luke asks. Dean frowns: “You just drank two mugs of coffee! Isn’t that enough?” Luke raises his arms in defence and says: “Can a man be thirsty? Jesus, do you have criticise my every move?” Dean rolls his eyes and picks up the cups for him and Aidan: “Drama queen. Go and get it yourself. I need to help out Aidan first.” He gently pushes Luke out of the way and makes his way over to the living room.

He stops in the door opening and smiles at the sight in front of him. Aidan is stroking Batman, the blanket tightly wrapped around his body. Batman his enjoying and licks Aidan’s arm. Aidan pulls back and looks at Batman. Dean decides it is the time to step in and walks over to the two.

He sits down next to Aidan and Batman finds his spot between the two men. Dean hands Aidan his tea and after a few seconds, Aidan takes it. Dean smiles and takes his own cup. Aidan looks at the tea before taking a small sip. It is hot, but Aidan doesn’t really care at the moment.

Dean puts his cup back and looks at Aidan: “Feeling a bit warmed up?” Aidan makes a small nod. “Great. Well, as you can see, the rain won’t stop for a long time, so I think you’re stuck here for a little while.” When he sees Aidan’s big eyes, Dean quickly places his hand on Aidan’s wrist: “No, no. Wait, wrong choice of words. You’ll just have to stay a little longer. I hope you don’t mind, though.” Aidan looks at him and Dean stares back.Aidan feels the fluttering feeling all over again and Dean feels like there are a thousand butterflies flying around in his stomach.

Their little moment gets interrupted by Luke walking in. Aidan quickly pulls away the gaze and looks down at his tea.

Luke sits down in the chair and puts his cup in front of him: “What a rain, right? Unbelievable. Well, not completely. I mean, it’s England we’re talking about.” Aidan lets out a small chuckle and presses his lips together as quick as his chuckle escaped his mouth, as if it is a wrong thing to do.

Dean looks in surprise at Aidan but doesn’t say anything about it. Instead, he just looks from Luke to Aidan and says: “Like I said, a bit of an idiot.”

“Who are you calling an idiot? I’m the journalist here, and not a waiter.” Dean frowns and Aidan cracks a very small smile.

“A-a j-journalist?” Aidan dares to ask, in a very quiet voice. Luke nods, happy that someone is finally interested in him and his work: “Yeah! I work for the local newspaper and I just write stories about the everyday life.” “But that’s just because there doesn’t happen anything these days.” Aidan looks up at Dean. “Not even exaggerating.” Luke just rolls his eyes at the statement and Dean throws a pillow at him.

“See? This is what I have to live with every day.” Luke jokes lightly and to Dean’s relief, Aidan lightly smiles at that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope it was worth the wait! Thanks for reading:) x


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _If you're feeling down, turn your frown upside down.  
>  Put a smile on your face, take the world in your embrace.  
> Ask for a little help from the man up above.  
> And remember you have your best friends love._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, another new chapter again:) Aidan has a breakdown and Dean is being a big sweetheart:) 
> 
> Sorry for the long wait, was kind of busy:$ x

It remains silent for a moment. Dean suddenly finds a lot of interest in the ceiling, not wanting to stare at Aidan. Aidan is looking at his hands, his face burning up a bit. Luke is inspecting the tea in his cup.

“So, Aidan. How long, eh, how long have you been here in London?” Luke eventually asks, breaking the slightly awkward silence. Dean lowers his head again, finding the situation safe enough again to look at the gorgeous man next to him.

Aidan quickly flickers his eyes between his hands and Luke and says in a soft voice: “About five days.” Luke moves forward and places his cup on the little coffee table. He looks up at Aidan and says: “That’s not that long, is it? And? Liking it so far?” Aidan swallows away the heavy knot in his throat before slowly nodding.

Dean starts to see Aidan is getting uncomfortable and decides to jump in. “That’s enough, Luke. Leave the guy alone.” he says, looking at his friend in the chair. Luke makes a sniffing sound with his nose and says: “Sorry, sorry. Getting excited, that’s all. I just really like that Dean finally made a new friend.”

Dean looks up at Luke and exclaims, rather offended: “What the hell is that supposed to mean?” “What? Your only real friends are me, Lee and Richard!” “Excuse you, mate, but what about Jared?” Dean snaps at Luke, leaning in a bit closer. “Jared? He is never around when you need him the most and when he is, he is only being an ass to you.” Luke says. Dean starts shuffling with his left foot and says in a soft and low voice, while playing with his right sleeve: “Not all of the time.” Luke raises his left eyebrow: “Not all the time? Yes, all the time. The dude can’t ever be nice to you, Deano.”

Dean snaps something back, but Aidan doesn’t even hear it anymore. Or he simply shuts their voices down. He remembers his parents like this. Even though they were a happy family, or so he always thought, his parents did fall out on each other sometimes. And most of the time, Aidan was the reason why. Aidan was the one they fought about.

~~

_“Aidan! Jesus mother of God! Can’t you ever do something right?!” The little boy’s head snaps up from the broken vase in front of him. He didn’t mean to break it. He really didn’t. He just accidentally hit it off the shelf while walking past it._

_Tears appear in Aidan’s eyes as he stutters: “I-I’m sorry, daddy, I-I didn’t mean to do it!” “Harold! Leave the kid alone! There is no need to yell at him!” His mother appears in the room and walks over to Aidan._

_The boy clings himself to her and she gives him a kiss on his forehead. She wraps her arm around his shoulder and pulls him close to her body. She looks up at her husband and says: “Where did this come from? How dare you yell at your own son for such a little thing? Are you mad in your head?” Aidan’s father seems taken aback by it and snaps: “Me? Mad in my head? It seems to be more like you to be mad in the head, woman. He broke a vase! Shouldn’t he be bloody punished for it?!”_

_”Don’t speak in such a foul language in front of Aidan, Harold!” “I do in front of whoever I wish, Emma!” Aidan’s father’s voice rises and Aidan starts to get scared. His mother notices and bends down to him: “Little one, go to your room for a while. I’ll come to you in a moment. Go, sweetheart.” She gently pushes him towards the door, shooting daggers at his father._

_Aidan is quick with listening and darts upstairs. He runs to his room and shuts the door. He climbs on top of his bed and presses his back against the white wall. He grabs his teddy bear and holds it close to his chest. He pulls his knees up and the tears that had been waiting to come out, escape and start rolling down his chest._

_He hears his father yelling awful things and words at his mother. His mother is a lot quieter than her husband but does yell things at the man that Aidan doesn’t dare to say out loud ever again. “_

_Stupid Aidan. Stupid. You are the one that caused mommy and daddy to fight.” The little kid thinks to himself as he lets the bear rest in his lap to cover up his ears with his little hands. He shuts his eyes but the tears keep on coming._

_“This child is getting on my nerves! Every day he has got to break something in this house!”_

_“He is your own bloody son, show some more respect towards the poor boy!”_

_“Poor boy? Are you taking sides? Aidan is only getting us to drift apart!”_

_“What the hell do you think you’re saying?! I am sticking up for my child, that’s what I’m doing! Especially when his own father is yelling and hurting him!” “_

_I am not hurting him! Telling the truth is completely different.”_

_“You do it on the wrong times, Harold! Learn how to bloody raise a child and stop making Aidan think you don’t love him!”_

_“Is that what you are getting out of this? Emma, I love you and you know I love Aidan as well. He is just working on my nerves. Babe, can’t you see? We have been fighting more often because of him!”_

_“Not because of him! Because you just keep on acting like a complete nutcase in front of him!”_

_“Don’t you start on this again, Emma!”_

~~

Aidan feels tears building up in his eyes. That memory brings back emotions he can’t even fully describe. All he gets out of it, is that he is always, always, the cause of fights. Wherever he goes and meets people, they start fighting. When he was younger, it were his mother and father. Now he is at Dean’s place, after letting Dean be so incredibly nice to offer him warmth, causing another fight again. Dean and his friend seem to get along so well and of course he managed to let them fight.

“I always mess up. I always mess up.” Dean hears soft whimpers and whispers in his left ear and stops his little argument with Luke and turns around to Aidan. Aidan is slowly rocking back and forth, whispering that he messes up to himself repeatingly and tears are rolling down his cheeks as he shuts his eyes.

“Aidan?! He, what’s the matter? Aidan!” Dean jumps up and goes standing in front of Aidan. He crunches down and lays his hands on Aidan’s knees, trying to stare directly in his eyes. Aidan still has got his eyes shut and Dean tries to let him open them up for him.

“Aidan, Aidan. Look at me. Aidan, please. Please try to look at me.” Dean begs, not trying to hush things up, knowing how Aidan can react.

Luke stands up as well and joins Dean. He as well crunches down but doesn’t make any movements to touch Aidan. He doesn’t know him any longer than an hour or so and he doesn’t want to make Aidan feel uncomfortable, especially not after what Dean has told him.

“Mate? Can you open up for Dean?” Luke tries, speaking in a low voice.

Aidan has stopped rocking but is now sobbing and his shoulders are shaking like mad. Dean shuffles a bit closer, trying not to panic. He doesn’t know what to do when your friend starts losing their vision and aren’t able to hear you anymore.

“He, Aidan. Aid. Calm down, calm down. It’s okay.” Dean says in a soft voice, looking at Aidan’s tears rolling down his face. Aidan still doesn’t open his eyes but whispers again: “I mess up. I always mess up. I did it again. I am a mess.” “No, no. Aidan, you’re not. You do not mess up. I promise you, you do not mess up. Never. Can you believe me?” Dean tells him, moving one hand up to Aidan’s wrist. The Irishman pulls back, but Dean keeps it tight. He looks at Aidan, hoping for a reaction. He only sees Aidan sobbing and marks from former tears on his face. The blanket he had wrapped around him has fallen off and his tea is cold by now. His jeans are still wet and the tears in Aidan’s eyes only make it worse.

Luke stares at Aidan and stands up. He carefully, very carefully, places his hand on Aidan’s shaking shoulders. Aidan flinches and Luke immediately pulls away. He looks at Dean in a somewhat awkward manner and says: “I, eh, I’ll just bring the cups back to the kitchen.” Dean nods at him and as Luke bends down to grab Aidan’s cup, he whispers in Dean’s ear: “Be careful with him, alright? Try not to rush things.” Dean nods again and Luke moves up again. He grabs his own cup and walks out of the room, softly closing the door.

Dean turns all of his attention back to Aidan and he lets Aidan sob for a minute. He notices how Aidan flinches at every single touch. How Aidan shuts his eyes whenever he cries. Like he doesn’t want to see what happens when he does.

“I-I c-can’t n-not mess up. I always mess up. I always mess up.” Aidan whimpers to himself. Dean pushes himself up and sits back down next to Aidan. He hesitates for a second, afraid of what might happen if he does, but he wraps one arm around Aidan’s shoulder. Aidan flinches again, but Dean keeps his arm strongly around the firm shoulders up until the moment Aidan seems to realise Dean won’t hurt him or have any intentions to and relaxes a bit. Dean can relax his arm as well and moves it up a bit. Aidan leans into the touch after a few minutes and starts crying in Dean’s shirt. He doesn’t mean to do so, it just, well, it just happens. Dean is so gentle with him, he hasn’t hurt him, he won’t hurt him. Aidan starts to feel comfortable around him.

Dean sighs and wraps his arm a little tighter around his tall friend. He bends his head down to look at Aidan and says in a soft and gentle voice: “Hey, it’s alright. You’re safe, you’re safe. It’s truly alright. You can let it all out, Aid. You can. And you are-you do not mess up. And you never will. Please, believe me when I say you won’t.” As expected, Aidan doesn’t reply, but his words does seem to calm him down, so Dean continues talking to him.

“Really, Aidan. You are doing great. See? Your tears have lessened. You are doing fantastic. You can do it. I believe in you. Whatever triggered this, we can help it away. We can help the problem away. I will stand by your side when it occurs again. I will. No matter where you are. Because that’s what friends are for, aren’t they?” “Y-You’ve o-only k-k-known me f-for f-five d-days.” Aidan whimpers, moving his head up a bit. Dean looks down at him and says: “And those five days were enough for me to see you are going to be a great friend to me.” Aidan bits his lip and stutters, tears still rolling down his face: “W-Why w-would y-you want to h-help me? I-I’m n-nothing b-but u-useless.” “No, Aidan! You’re not. I want to help you because you look like a friendly lad to me. That’s why.”

Aidan moves his body up and shakes his shoulders a little bit. Dean gets the message and removes his arm from Aidan’s shoulders. Aidan looks down and Dean sees a tear dropping down. Without even realising it, Dean moves his hand forward and wipes away the remaining tears on Aidan’s face. Aidan looks at him with the saddest eyes Dean has ever seen and a confused look on his face.

“Why do you think you messed up?” Dean asks in a gentle voice, looking up at Aidan. Aidan sniffs and says in a shaking voice: “I-I always do. I-I always c-cause p-people to s-start fighting.” Dean gulps and blinks rapidly a couple of times: “You, you think you’re the cause of mine and Luke’s argument? Oh, Aidan, no. No, you were not the reason of why we started that ridiculous fight. Honestly.” “B-But I-I was. I-if you hadn’t met me, he wouldn’t have said y-you finally started making friends b-because of me.” Aidan chokes out, wiping away the tears under his eyes with his sleeves.

“Aidan, you are not the cause of it. Me and Luke have fights about literally everything. We fight about the littlest and stupidest things you can think of. Take the remove for the TV. We fight about that all the time. Honestly, Aidan. You did not mess that up. It wasn’t your fault.” Dean says and places his hand on Aidan’s thigh. Aidan sniffs and says: “I-I, I w-was a-always the r-reason w-why m-my parents fought. Why not now again?” That breaks Dean’s heart and he says: “Because now you weren’t, mate. Can you believe me? You are a very sweet guy, why would you be the reason of why me and Luke get into an argument? There is no reason to think of. I promise you, things are alright. Me and Luke are still very good friends and you are just an amazing friend to come and join us.”

Aidan sniffs again and Dean moves his hand up again to wipe away the last tears on Aidan’s face. He looks at him and asks again: “Can you believe me?” “I-I’ll t-try.” Aidan stutters in a silent voice. Dean smiles and squeezes Aidan’s wrist: “You did great, Aidan. Really great. I think I need to get you some new tea. Just to calm down everything again.” Dean stands up and grabs the fussy blanket. He gently wraps it around Aidan again and calls out for Batman.

The dog had dashed away the second Aidan broke down and has been laying for dead in his dog bed for the whole time.

“Cheer up Aidan for me while I’m away to get something else to get him comfortable again. Can you do that for me?” Dean points his finger up at Batman and the dog barks. He smiles and ruffles the fur. “Be right back, Aidan. I won’t be long.” Aidan slowly nods and looks down.

Batman senses the sad vibe in the room and gently presses his wet nose against Aidan’s hands. Aidan shows a very small smile and strokes Batman’s fur.

Dean smiles at the sight and silently leaves the room, thinking it maybe isn’t a good idea to leave Aidan alone in the state he is in now. He may have calmed down now, but Dean has heard too many stories of people who fell back seconds later. But Dean hasn’t handled with breakdowns before, this is his first time, so he really doesn’t know what to do other than to try to stay calm and comfort the person. Which was Aidan in this case.

He walks up to the kitchen and finds Luke standing there, leaning over the table, scrolling through his laptop.

Luke looks up when he hears someone walking into the kitchen and sighs when he sees it’s Dean. Dean presses his lips together and walks up to the sink to grab a cup. “And? How did it go? Is he still-” Luke stops talking when Dean shakes his head.

“No, he stopped. I managed to calm him down. I hope. I don’t know if he will fall back. Maybe I should just go back right now.” Luke stops him: “Let him. Just for a short moment. You did great, Deano. I heard you in here and you really did. I’m proud of you, mate.” Dean sighs as he cleans the cup in his hands: “I feel so bad for Aidan. I don’t know what has happened in his life to make him so emotional.” “He didn’t say anything about it?” Luke asks, standing up. Dean leans on the counter with his elbows and says: “He did say something about always being the reason why his parents fought.” That makes Luke silent for a second.

“Oh. That’s kind of really something, Dean.” Luke says, rubbing his chin. Dean nods and moves his lips up a bit: “I know. But I want to help him. Especially because it looks like he’s had quite a bad past. And what if it is still going on? I need to do this. As a friend.” “I understand, Deano. And I will help wherever I can. You’re a good friend, Dean.” Dean smiles at him: “Thank you. You’re a good friend to, Lukey.” “Don’t call me that, that’s so horrible.” Luke moans. Dean grins and quickly pours some tea into the cup. He walks towards the door again and Luke says: “But not to Jared!” “Shut the hell up, Luke!” Dean exclaims back and walks back to Aidan.

Luke rolls his eyes and slowly follows Dean. He leans against the doorframe and watches how gentle Dean is around Aidan.

Dean walks up to the curly haired man, making him look up. Aidan has marks of dried up tears on his face, but there are no new ones and that reassures Dean. Batman is behaving very good and has his eyes closed, enjoying Aidan stroking his fur. Aidan shows the small smile again and Dean feels himself warming up.

He hands Aidan the cup and patiently waits for Aidan to actually grab it. Once he has so, Dean sits down and Batman lies down in front of the two men. “Are you feeling a bit better yet?” Dean asks, after Aidan hesitantly took his first sip from the new tea. His hands are still shaking and the eyes are the same as when Dean brought Aidan with him. It is like when he found him on the streets again.

Aidan nods and looks down. He says in a soft voice, nearly in a whisper: “T-thanks for helping m-me.” Dean smiles and lays his hand on Aidan’s shoulder. He feels him tense up, but Aidan doesn’t pull away this time. Instead, he looks up at him and whispers: “Thank you.” Dean smiles warmly at him and wants to hug him. He doesn’t though, not sure how Aidan would react to it if he already flinches at a slight touch. He just lightly pats him on his shoulder and smiles.

Aidan looks up at the window and suddenly moves very fast. He jumps up, the blanket falling on the ground. Aidan immediately bends down to grab it but Dean stops him: “Whoa, Aidan. What’s going on?” Aidan doesn’t look at him, he just tries cleaning up his ‘mess’ and says in a rather frightened voice, which kind of scares Dean a little bit,: “I-I n-need to go h-home.” “What? But, are you-Where do you live? I can give you a ride.” Dean wanted to ask if he is ready to go yet, but he decides it’s not really the right thing to ask.

“N-no, t-that’s n-not needed. T-the sun i-is shining, I- I can walk.” Aidan stutters. “This is England, Aidan. When the sun shines, it won’t last for long. And I don’t mind bringing you home. If you live far from here, it would actually be my pleasure to drop you off.” “I-I d-don’t w-want to t-tire y-you.” Aidan suddenly doesn’t dare to move as he starts rubbing his arm.

Dean softly smiles and says: “You don’t tire me, Aidan. I care about your health and I just think it won’t be good if you walk home right now. Let me give you this ride. Just this once.” Dean says, not walking closer to Aidan.

Aidan looks up at Luke, as if he is asking permission and looks back at Dean. _I can ask him to drop me off a bit earlier._ Aidan thinks to himself and slowly nods at Dean. Dean’s face lights up and for some reason it makes Aidan feel a bit better about himself. He made Dean happy. That’s a good thing. Right?

“Come on then. Let’s get your jacket. Luke, I won’t be long. You can start making dinner ready.” Dean grabs his car keys and Luke sighs rather annoyed: “You know I can’t cook. I’ll just get take away, Dean.” Dean rolls his eyes but chuckles.

He turns to Aidan and says: “This way.” Aidan slowly steps forward and walks after Dean. He keeps his head low when he passes Luke, but he still hears him say: “Best of luck, mate.” He follows Dean up till the point where he gets his jacket handed. Aidan is quick with putting it on and waits for Dean to open up the door.

They walk outside and stop at a small, blue car. Dean blushes a bit when he sees Aidan looking at it: “Yeah, I know. It isn’t the best of cars, but it is mine and that’s what counts.” Aidan doesn’t reply and Dean just opens the door for him. Aidan gets in after looking at Dean multiple times and Dean gets in himself as well.

~~

The way to Aidan’s house is quiet. ‘I lived’ from OneRepublic is playing in the background and it calms Aidan down a bit. He does feel nervous though. He has no idea in what state he would find his father. He could be outrageous about the fact he is home so late. Or he could be very quiet and just explode when Aidan does something very small, yet wrong. But still. His father had sent him out of the house and it still confuses Aidan. He doesn’t know what had caused his father to be so angry.

He looks at the familiar trees that pass by the window and spots the country lane that leads to his house. He swallows away some nerves and turns to Dean: “Y-You c-can s-stop here.” Dean turns to him before focusing on the road again: “You sure? I can drop you off in front of your house, if you want.” Aidan quickly shakes his head: “N-No, no. T-this is f-fine. T-this l-lane l-leads directly to my house.” “Alright. That’s fine.” Dean smiles and Aidan silently sighs in relief.

A little less than 5 minutes, they arrive at the lane and Dean stops the car. The kiwi looks around the area and Aidan sees some amazement in his eyes.

“You live far away from the city, Aidan. I suppose you don’t have as much noises as you heard in my apartment.” Dean lightly grins and Aidan just moves up the corner of his mouth. “Well then, I will get out of the car with you. I won’t go with you if you don’t to. Don’t worry.” Dean says before opening the door. Aidan nods and opens the door himself as well.

He steps out of the car and waits for Dean to walk around his vehicle. The blond man joins him and Aidan turns to him, looking at the ground. “I hope you will get there safely, Aidan. I suppose there is someone to catch you up, right?” Aidan doesn’t say anything and Dean says: “Anyway, I really liked that you were around, Aidan. Really.” Aidan looks up and Dean says: “Just, send me a text or something to say you got home safe. I know, it is somewhere over there, but you can’t ever be too sure.” Aidan lightly smiles at that and says in a soft voice: “T-thank you a-again. Y-you w-were the f-first p-person to c-care f-for me h-here.” Dean’s eyes go slightly wider and Aidan turns around.

He rapidly walks onto the lane and only turns around when he knows for sure Dean doesn’t see him.

Dean watches as Aidan disappears into the lane and doesn’t move for a moment. Is he really? Did Aidan seriously mean that? Dean swallows away a lump in his throat and steps back into his car again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading:) Leave comments/kudos if you liked it! :) x


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Trusting you is not hard.  
>  The rest of the world, now, that’s a different matter.  
> But I trust you, as I trust the Sun to rise,  
> Feel free to hide.  
> Sometimes words fail us,  
> We cannot find the truth within. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the delay, I was on vacation to Spain and had no wifi whasoever:( But I'm back with another chapter! This one is not one of my best, but I wanted something up. I hope you'll enjoy it! :)

Aidan hears the car driving away and lets out a deep breath. He turns away from the main road and starts walking back to his own house. His breath is shaking and his hands are running from his curly hair to his face.

He’s afraid. He’s scared. He’s so scared. He doesn’t know how to find his father at home and he actually doesn’t want to find out. His father can be silent at home, like he has been shut down, like his power has been turned off. But he can also be outrageous, still throwing with things and still being very angry. Or maybe he will be angry at Aidan for not coming home quick enough. He did send his son out of the house, but Aidan doesn’t know how long he was supposed to be staying away. And the thought of what his father mind do to him if he is in fact too late scares Aidan like mad. And what if he knows he was at Dean’s apartment? Aidan suddenly starts fearing for his own life and Dean’s safety. If his father does indeed know it, both he and Dean will suffer. And, if he finds out about Luke living there as well… Luke will high probably also get hurt. Not even high probably, it will be happening.

Aidan starts shaking his head, trying to get rid of the many thoughts flying through his head. But no matter how hard he is trying, it is not helping. All he gets out of it are images of a badly beaten Dean. His friends are surrounding him, sending daggers at Aidan. They are yelling at him that he needs to stay away from Dean. Dean himself is more than scared. He is terrified of Aidan. When he tries to reach out for him, Dean backs away, screaming and stuttering, all but wanting Aidan to leave him alone. His friends get even angrier, now cursing and threatening Aidan.

“Go away!” Aidan yells and falls on his knees. He places his hands on the sides of his head and shuts his eyes. He presses his hands closer and is groaning and begging for the thoughts to go away. They hurt, they hurt a lot. He gets scared from them. Those angry friends seem so real, it is like they are already in front of him. And Dean… He never wants to see Dean like that again. Not in real life and not in his head. It hurts his heart seeing him like that. Aidan likes Dean, still figuring out if it is more than liking a friend. He does like Dean more than a friend, but having his trust issues give it another twist as well. He feels like Dean doesn’t like him back in the same way like he does.

But Dean is just.. Dean is Dean. Aidan never gives in to people. Never. Whenever someone is being nice to him for a couple of weeks, they will do something that just shows he has been used again. And every time he meets someone new, Aidan shuts down. He doesn’t let people in that easily and lost many friends this way. It is a wonder how Adam is still around, that’s what Aidan thinks every single day again and again.

But Dean is different. So different. Yes, Aidan did lock himself away from him on the first couple of days. Out of natural habit and out of self-defence. He knows like no other what’s it like to be used and hurt and just can’t let anyone in on the first day. With Dean he felt like never before. The way Dean acts towards him, talks to him. Cares for him… He is the first one since Adam to care for him. It is so surreal that Aidan barely believes Dean is real. But he is. He got him off the street, out of the rain. He didn’t have to do that, yet he did. He brought him to his warm home. His warm and safe home. He gave him the warmth and care that only Adam knew how to give. Dean made the difference.

Aidan takes a deep breath before realising the voices are gone. And when the images stop in his head as well, Aidan dares to open up his again and looks around him. There is no one there. His black curls have fallen in front of his face and his body has turned cold. He pushes himself up and moves his eyes around the area. The clouds have covered up the sun and it seems like it is about to start raining again. _Bloody England and its fucked up rain_.

The first drops fall down on Aidan’s body and soon it is pouring all out of the sky. Aidan moves his head up and takes another deep breath. Rain is running down his face, cold as ice. They land on his eyelashes, making it hard for him to see.

Aidan starts moving his head around. He switches his glares from the ground to the sky. After just as few second, Aidan starts walking back to his house. But every step is heavy. Like his shoes are filled with millions of stones. His legs also don’t seem to function anymore. They move into every possible direction but ‘home’. He sets his mind straight and focuses on the road, trying to see through the heavy rain, not caring he is getting wet at all. If he doesn’t get home on time now, it won’t be a pleasant night for him. And he really needs to hurry up, it is raining like mad. And to add up, the night is slowly falling as well. Aidan starts running and is soon at the front gate of his house.

~~

Dean is mindlessly driving home, watching as the rain slides down the windows of the car and looking at every single street light that is passing by. The red and yellow light make him only think of Aidan.

The fact that he even got him to come to his apartment still wonders Dean. Aidan was a mess when he found him. Like he had never seen anyone before. Aidan’s crying broke his heart and to just let him out there in the rain, Dean just couldn’t do that. Not to a friend. Not to someone who he maybe wants to be more than friends with. But that won’t happen any time soon, Dean fears. Aidan has clearly trouble trusting people, let alone let people take care of him. It’s like something bad happened in his past. Something really bad because this doesn’t happen in one day. Maybe it is even still going…

Whatever it is, it traumatized Aidan deeply and the Kiwi is determined to help Aidan out of the dark and gain some interest in life again. The young Irishman seems to have lost that, it takes a lot for him to crack a smile. Something that lights up Dean’s mood every time. And he is proud to say he managed to make Aidan show that smile a few times.

But Dean has noticed something that he did not spoke or ask Aidan about. When he helped him from the ground, Dean saw the big scratches on Aidan’s hands. Alright, he had fallen on the ground, there he got those of course. Logical. But as Dean brought him home, he saw a couple of bruises on Aidan’s face. And when he took off his jacket, Dean saw another few bruises and other marks on Aidan’s only. And he swears he has seen dried blood on his forehead, but Dean would rather remove that out of his head.

How in the world would Aidan get all of that for falling on the ground? The blood would not have been dry and those marks are not from today. They’re fresh, but they’ve been there longer. But one of those marks sickens Dean. It sickens him so bad, but one of those marks, it had the shape of a hand. Like someone hurt him on purpose.

“Perhaps that man.” Dean whispers as he narrows his eyes and grabs on tighter around the steering wheel, getting more confused by all of the thoughts floating through his head. They drive him mad. Crazy. Completely shaken up.

But, they also anger him. What if Aidan was indeed hurt by someone? Or even worse, still is? Hell, that would explain why Aidan doesn’t trust him. He would be afraid Dean is going to hurt him too. Which is of course never going to happen. Besides, Dean is in all states to kill that person that is hurting Aidan. Right here and now.

Dean starts shaking his head and bites on his lip. He needs to talk about this all with Luke, Lee and Richard. They can sure help him out and tell him what is the right thing to do. Luke knows for sure what to do, he has met Aidan already today. And Dean really wants Aidan to meet the other two as well.

He focuses back on the road and drops his shoulders before tuning into a side road to get to his apartment.

~~

Aidan is standing in front of the door. It is getting dark and Aidan is heavily breathing and sweating. He is so scared and nervous. He is feeling hot and wet, the rain still pouring down. It is much hence the fact Aidan being soaking wet within a minute.

He moves his hand up to open the door. The hand is shaking like a leaf and he can’t get to stop shaking. His eyes are focused on that one hand, nothing else matters now. His heart is beating in fast motion and he swallows away the big lump in his throat. He opens up the door and waits with stepping inside. He starts listening to possible sounds and hears nothing inside. It is deadly silence. The only sound Aidan hears, is the sound of an annoying buzz that just doesn’t want to stop zooming. The silence scares Aidan even more and he closes his eyes before entering his house, softly and slowly closing the door behind him. He can hear the rain slamming against the door but ignores it.

His eyes darts around the hallway. It is a mess. Picture frames, vases, shoes, books, glasses. Everything is laying for dead on the ground. The pictures, vases and glasses broken apart. Pieces of glass are everywhere. His father had been quite angry, if Aidan thinks mildly about it.

He moves his body and carefully steps over the sharp pieces of glass. It is hard, there is barely space left on the ground to step without cutting your skin. And Aidan wants everything but that. Especially after he got a piece of glass in his hands and leg. That hurt too much and Aidan wants to prevent it from happening again.

He gets to the living room and slowly cranes his neck to look inside. There is his father, slumbered into his big chair. Of course, there is a bottle in his hand. But not just any bottle. It is whisky. And whisky is not good for Aidan’s father. It’s not good for anyone, but Aidan’s father gets very, very moody from it. He gets mood swings and so lazy. Even lazier than normal. His father’s hand is bleeding and is sleeping.

Aidan swallows and turns back. He remembers his phone in the kitchen and jumps over the glass, hissing in pain when he feels the burning from his bruises and cuts. He rushes into the kitchen and sighs in relief when he finds his phone still lying on the kitchen table. Dean’s number right next to it. For a moment, Aidan was fearing his father would have found it. Then he would be in big, big trouble. But clearly he was too busy destroying and ripping apart everything they own to get into the kitchen to get something to eat. Which relieves Aidan an awful lot.

The Irishman sighs and falls down on the closest chair, which happens to be the one in front of them. He looks up. From this spot he can look right through the window in the kitchen and sees the rain falling down like no tomorrow. It is a lot and he is still wet. He is dripping on the floor and his chair is now wet as well. His hair is stuck to his face and his clothes are glued to his body. He bites on his lip and looks down. There lays his phone, in all of its glory. The number is right next to it and Aidan presses his phone on again. It opens at the page where Aidan had left it this morning. At putting Dean into his phone. One number is still there to be put in in order to fulfil this job.

Aidan looks from the phone to the paper and after a couple of hesitating moments, Aidan presses in the last number. He has done it. He has actually done it. Dean’s number. It is finally in his phone. But what of it? Aidan knows himself by now. He won’t call Dean or send him a message. He doesn’t dare to do so. He’d love to do it, but by calling his father will hear him. Whispering is no option, it will be too suspicious. And with texting is it also a drama. Aidan can’t do that. He never knows what to answer and waits days before finally knowing what to say.

And with Dean it will definitely turn into such a situation. Dean is just good of a human being, he can’t bring that upon that. Not upon his beautiful self, with his blond locks and his cute smile. His beautiful lips and those eyes.. Aidan immediately shakes that away, getting shocked by his own thoughts. But they are true. He is nothing in comparison to Dean. Nothing. He is the beast and Dean is the beauty. It is that and it will always stay that way.

Aidan sighs and puts the phone into his pocket. He thinks of his father and shots up. He turns around and gets himself past all the glass again. He gets to the living room and gets inside again. Now he sits down on the couch, very careful not to wake his father. The man is lying for dead in the chair, not moving and his mouth is hanging open, drool dripping out on the side.

Aidan watches his father for a second before looking around their living room. It is a mess. Everything is torn apart and destroyed. It is awful and Aidan does not understand why his father has done it. All that meant so much to Aidan, it is all shattered apart and it will never get back to him. He has lost it all. His father has now completely lost his mind, he has gone mental.

Aidan’s head shots back when his father starts groaning and making noises. The man stretches out his arms and opens his eyes. He scratches his butt and moves his body up. He blinks a couple of times and takes a sip from the whisky. He sees Aidan and says nothing for a second. Aidan looks back and the sweat is back. The way his father is looking at him scares him and the fact that he is not talking only makes it worse.

“You damn child. Why are you back? Didn’t I send you out?” his father slurs, burping and sending a deadly glare at his son. Aidan gulps and stutters: “I-I k-k-know, but I thought y-you were done and was w-waiting for me to get home…” His father lets out a breathless laugh and exclaims: “Me? Waiting for you to get back? Don’t you fucking make me laugh, Aidan! I was hoping you would stay away for a good couple of days, to give me some rest. You are doing my head in, you know that right?” Aidan looks down and asks in a soft voice: “Do you want me to move out?”

His father stands up and walks over to him. He roughly grabs his chin and forces Aidan to look him right in the eyes. “Did I say that? Are you that dumb? No, I don’t. Without you, this place would be a mess. And I can’t let you run off to the police. No, I needed you away for a couple of days. And I know you, you have no friends. Not a life. You would be sleeping on the streets. But why would I care?” Aidan wants to look away but his father is strong and doesn’t allow him to move. “Now, out. Out of my space. Go to your basement, where you belong. And don’t you dare try to escape. You won’t get out unless I say so.” He pushes Aidan away and gets back to his chair. He lets himself fall into it and gestures to Aidan to leave.

Aidan is up in a second and rushes out of the living room, so relieved he did not ask about Dean. He stops to look at the glass on the ground. All of those vases belonged to his mother. And now they are broken. Precious memories. Pure memories. His father has taken it all away from him. He suddenly feels a hand, pulling his curls. He does not have to look up to know what is going on. His father has stand up from his chair and is now by his side, having a handful of hair in his fist.

“You ignorant brat! What did I say? Basement!” He pulls Aidan with him, roughly shoving away the glass that is lying in his way. He opens up the door to the basement and throws Aidan into it. It is cold, ice cold. His father sends him a deadly glare before closing the door and Aidan collects himself to gain some warmth.

He is feeling lonely. So lonely. He wants Adam right by his side, right now. He wants Dean on the other side, even though he hasn't completely let him in yet.

He moves his head to his pocket and looks up. He thinks for a good fifteen minutes before grabbing his phone. He goes to his contacts and scrolls down until he has found the right number.

 _I shouldn’t be doing this. This is wrong. He doesn’t want my call now, he is probably sleeping._ Aidan thinks, looking at his screen. This is the biggest thing he has ever done in his life so far but Aidan doesn’t know if he is ready for it. But he needs to do it. He wants to do it. And, he’s got quite a good reason to do it. He knows what he wants to say, what he wants to tell him. And maybe, just maybe, the person on the other side will respond to him.

The basement is the perfect place. No matter how loud you scream, the people outside of it will not hear you. Whatever you say or do, it stays inside the basement.

Aidan takes a deep breath and looks at his screen. Yes, he is going to it. He slowly presses on the green phone and with shaking hands, he brings it to his ear.

~~

Dean is sitting on the side of his bed. When he got home, Luke wasn’t there. He left a note, saying he got an urgent call from another friend and couldn’t leave him hanging.

Aidan. That’s all that Dean can think about. Aidan, Aidan, Aidan. Nothing else seems to matter to him anymore. But the Irishman has caught him completely off guard. His black curls, bouncing on top of his head when he is moving, his beautiful deep voice, his handsome face and eyes to just drown in.. Dean knows it. He likes Aidan. He likes Aidan a lot. There is no way around it. No matter how hard he tries to say no to it, he can’t deny that he likes Aidan more than a friend.

He looks outside the window, to the stars, when his phone lights up and starts vibrating. Dean sighs, not really wanting to be bothered by anyone at this hour. He grabs the phone and checks to see who it is.

The number is unknown.

Dean’s heart start beating really fast. This could be him. This could be Aidan. What if it is him? This will be a big step for him and Dean can’t think straight right now. He changes his mind. He does wants to be bothered, especially by Aidan.

He comes back to Earth and answers the phone.

“Hello, Dean speaking.”

“Hello, Dean… This, eh, this is me. I m-mean, this is A-Aidan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, I hope you enjoyed it! If you did, leave kudos or a comment or whatever you want:) 
> 
> I've gotten so much support with this, it is unbelievable and surreal, thank you all! :D x


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Flash. Dash. Blank. Tank.  
>  I'm So Scared. I've Frightened Myself.  
> I Died. I'm Blinded.  
> All My Hopes, Sanity.  
> I've Drowned. My Heart Was A Loud Pound.  
> It Was A Disgrace...I Was Misplaced..  
> I Got Lost. My Screams Would Burst._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Here is the next chapter of 'Don't close Your Eyes!' And can we just celebrate, because fuck, I hit over a 100 kudos! Thank you so much, omg, that was the last thing I expected!
> 
> And I'm sorry this is a shitty chapter, I just really wanted to update. More action in the next chapter! Enjoy:)

“Aidan?! Hey! What a surprise!” Dean happily exclaims, immediately fully awake and focused on that beautiful voice. The thoughts of Aidan never calling or texting him fade away and make space for a new load of hope.

“H-hey, D-Dean… I-I w-wanted to thank y-you. F-for what you did f-for me today.” Aidan’s voice stutters from the other end of the line. He seems very nervous, it’s like he’s everything but comfortable doing this. Somehow this isn’t too big of a surprise for Dean. It already took him a long time to even do this, let alone texting.

Dean smiles through the phone and says: “it was no big deal, Aidan. That’s what friends do, really. You are very welcome, mate.” He starts playing with the sheets on his bed and finds himself biting on his lip. What’s going on? Is he nervous? Not really. Right?

It took Aidan a while before answering, “T-thanks a-again a-anyway.” Dean chuckles and says: “You really don’t have to thank me, Aidan. You’ve done that enough already.” Aidan doesn’t straight away, just like before. Dean hears some shuffling on the background, it sounds rather hallow. A buzz is zooming strongly as well and he hears Aidan letting out a sigh.

“Aid? You’re still there?” Dean eventually asks, when it takes Aidan nearly a minute to speak up. “Y-yes, I-I am. S-sorry, s-something w-was b-b-bothering me for a s-second.” Aidan’s voice comes again. But, this time it sounds a lot quieter and softer. Dean frowns a bit but shakes his head. He stands up and walks over to his window. “It’s okay, mate. Is it something I should be worried about?” Dean asks as he draws little figures on his window.

“N-no, no!” Aidan answers quick. It sounds as if he has shot up while saying that. Dean can hear noises on the background again, but just decides to keep on talking as if nothing is going on. Whatever it is, Aidan most certainly does not want to bring it up in the conversation.

“Alright, alright. I won’t then.” Dean just chuckles, running his hand through his messy hair. He can see himself through his window. The night has fallen and the stars are sparkling in the air. An airplane flies by and slowly the clubs around his apartment are opening. He can feel a cold air passing his neck and notices he has left a window open.

He scraps his throat and decides to ask what has been bothering him since Aidan had left his house. Since he saw those bruises and cuts on his body. He wants to know. He needs to know.

He takes a deep breath and asks: “Eh, ehm, I, eh, I want to ask you something, Aidan. Something pretty serious and I really want you to answer me. As honest as possible.” Dean can hear Aidan falling silent on the other end and he wonders if this was the right moment to ask it.

“What were those bruises on your arms? And that cut on your face?” he just throws it out, now just really wanting to know it. He has been thinking about it the entire evening but he hasn’t said a word about to Luke. He wasn’t so sure about it then, but now he just really needs to have a straight answer.

-

Aidan’s breathing process starts to get heavier. He feels his heart rate fastening and his body temperature gets from the cold he feels in the bloody basement to the heat in the Sahara.

_Dean knows it. Dean has seen them._

He tries to even his breath, failing miserably. He has been trying to avoid this from happening. To hide away all of his pain, all of the bruises, the cuts. Everything. He has tried not to stay with Dean for too long, too afraid he would give away something from the life he’d want to escape more than anything else in the world. But he has failed. Dean has seen more than he was supposed to see. Which was nothing. He realises he’s been silent for way too long and chokes out,

“T-that w-was n-n-nothing. I f-fell t-t-this m-morning..” It is a bad excuse, but Aidan really doesn’t know what to do right now. He’s stuck as glue to paper and has no other words to use right at the spot.

“Really? Are you sure? They looked pretty bad, mate. How hard did you fell?” Dean sounds sceptic and Aidan couldn’t blame him for that. Of course he doesn’t believe him, especially not after such a crappy poor excuse.

“I-I, eh, I s-stumbled d-d-down the stairs.” Aidan just says, closing his eyes out of frustration. All he wants to do, is cry. He wants to cry. Dean getting suspicious is already bad enough, but having to talk about him getting abused is the hardest thing for Aidan. Even though it isn’t really talking about his abuse, but just making excuses that shouldn’t be allowed to be called excuses.

“Did you? Mate, I’m sorry. Today must have been a shitty day for you then, I suppose.” Dean says, still not sounding convinced. But he is right. Today was a shitty day. In fact, all of his days have been shitty. And those in London, have been the worst. Because there is no one there to help him. No one except for Dean. But let him be just the person that can’t know about any of his problems. Aidan just hates his life. He hates it and he wants to run away from it. Run away into the lands of freedom. Away from that man who he calls his father. Away from the pain, the abuse, the lies. Away from the fear of the unknown and the fear for every day.

“But, I, eh, I saw scars. And a cut in your face. That wasn’t from that fall, I hope?” Dean suddenly sounds a bit upset and Aidan curses inside himself. _Well done, now you’ve made him upset. Can’t you do anything right in your pathetic thing you call life?_

“W-what?! No, o-of course n-not. M-my f-f-father d-dropped a-a v-vase and a p-piece of the g-glass f-flew i-into my face.” Aidan stutters, his eyes widen. That isn’t even a full lie. Yes, his father did destroy a vase. But he didn’t drop it, he had thrown it. He has thrown the vase down on the ground, right in front of Aidan.

“Oh. Aid, I’m sorry for asking all of those questions. But, are you really sure nothing is going on? Because I’d actually would like to know if that’s the case. I want to help you, you really need to know that.” Dean says from the other end, sounding less tense than before.

Aidan swallows away the big lump in his throat and says in a soft voice, “I-I know.” He can just hear Dean’s smile from the other end and lets out a sigh of relief. He made it. He made it through. He knows Dean is still doubting all of what he said, but at least he doesn’t keep going about it.

“So, eh, Aid. I want to ask you something else as well. Don’t worry, it’s nothing serious or anything. It’s something fun, I suppose. I mean, I think it’s fun. Alright, quitting the rambling, my friend Richard owns that restaurant where you came in a few weeks ago. Remember? I work there.” Dean says and Aidan can hear the cracking of a bed.

“I-I do.” Aidan answers, slightly moving away from the phone to check if his father is anywhere near yet. He isn’t, Aidan can hear his snoring from miles away and is relieved to know his father is still slumbered back into his chair, sleeping like no tomorrow.

“Well, I was wondering if you wanted to come around sometime. I can introduce you to my other two friends, Richard and his partner Lee. Luke can come along too, of course.” Dean speaks up and Aidan slightly straightens his back. He can hear Dean’s breathing coming through his phone and feels like he should be quicker with answering this time.

Aidan would really like going there with Dean. Seeing his other friends, maybe making some friends as well. But he is scared. Aidan is not good with people. Not good at all. It took him long enough to have Dean and Adam as friends but those two are different. They didn’t judge him or whatever, they just took him for who he was and that is something Aidan really appreciates. Although, with Dean he isn’t a hundred per cent sure yet. But something tells him Dean will be the Adam from London. And maybe, just maybe, even more than a friend.

But moving that aside, there is also another problem. And that problem is otherwise known as his father. That man won’t ever allow him to meet up with other people. Let alone Dean. Hell, his father won’t even let him out of the house unless he is unbelievably angry or when he needs something.

He lets out a deep breath and says softly: “I-I’d l-love t-t-to, b-but-” “But not yet. I understand. Don’t worry about it, Aidan, it will come around whenever you’re ready for it.” Dean cuts him off, surprising Aidan a lot. “Y-you r-really don’t mind?” Aidan asks, just to make sure Dean really said it. He needs confirmation, he doesn’t want disappointment.

“No, heck, no. I kind of see you have trouble meeting new people and I understand. But it will happen, right?” Aidan lets out a small chuckle at that, and quickly stops it in case his father has heard it.

“I-I t-think s-so. Y-yes.” He just can’t stop stuttering and it is starting get annoying to himself. He wonders what it could sound like to Dean. Would he find it annoying as well? If he does, he is pretty good at hiding that.

“Really? That’s awesome, mate! Would I-” A loud bang cuts off Dean’s sentence and Aidan’s head snaps up in quick motion. His heart starts beating like a manic again and he feels sweat breaking out, starting to roll over his forehead. His father. He is awake.

_Shit._

“What was that? Aidan? Is everything alright?” Dean’s worried voice comes from the other end and Aidan can just picture his big eyes. “I-I n-n-need t-to g-go. I-I’m s-s-so s-sorry.” Aidan stutters, wanting to end the phone call right now before his father walks in. Because he will. He always does. Checking on him, to see if he is still there. Not that he can possibly escape that filthy basement anyway.

“What, no. It’s alright. No need to apologize.” Dean says, starting to talk fast as well. As if he is sensing Aidan’s rush.

Aidan wants to answer, but suddenly he hears his father standing in front of the door. He hears his hand moving up to the door knob to throw the door open. His eyes widen in fear and before he can say another word to Dean, he clicks him away and quickly hides the phone in his pocket. He grabs his pillow and lies down as fast and silent as possible.

The door flies open, revealing his father. His hair is looking dirty and his blouse is half open. The buttons on the ends of the sleeves are open, revealing his hairy arms. There are beer stains on his pants and he is bare foot.

The man walks down the small stairs and walks up to Aidan, who shuts his eyes, hoping to let it be over soon. Preferably without any pain. His father kicks against his back and Aidan lets out a yelp. His father roughly turns around and grabs him in his collar. He pulls him up so Aidan faces him. The younger lad can smell the awful taste of alcohol and his arm pits. He wants to throw up but keeps it inside. He’s done that so many times now, this time shouldn’t be any different.

“Aren’t we sleeping yet? What else could I have expected from you, you little brat.” His father looks at him with angry eyes, something he does at Aidan every time. He never looks at him with happy, proud eyes. They are always filled with anger and disappointment.

Aidan doesn’t answer straight away and his father tightens his grasp around his already bruised arms. Aidan lets out a squeak and gets a slap in his face. “Oh, are we squeaking like little girls now? What else is new. You, acting like a little girl. What’s next, talking to yourself? Because that’s something you seemed to have picked up as well!” his father snarls at him and Aidan freezes. He has heard him talking to Dean. _Fuck._

“I-I’m t-t-terribly s-sorry f-f-for t-that, f-father.” he stutters and his father starts shaking him around, not releasing the very tight grasp. “Fucking hell, when did I ask for my stupid son to act like a girl? Never! And why today? Just on the fucking day I lost my wife because of this pathetic brat!” His father screams in his face and Aidan wants to curl up in a ball. That’s why his father was so angry today. His mother. He has lost his mother on this day. So many years ago. Today is the day all of the pain started. How could he forget? “Listen up, you are going to sleep now or I will make you. Understand me? Good.” He throws Aidan back on the ground and the boy now actually curls into a small ball, not yet crying. But he does want to. He wants to cry all of his worries out.

His father snorts at him and says: “And just so you know, tomorrow I will go away for a few days. To an old friend of mine. Don’t expect me to tag you along, because you’re the reason why I’m going. I need a fucking break from you. Ever since we got here, you have started misbehaving a lot more. And I’m done with your shit. You will be home alone for a week, but don’t expect me to get you dinner. I’m not your maid. Now, go to sleep and don’t you dare waking up.” His father sends him a dirty glare and walks away again, closing the door with a loud noise.

Aidan bites his lip and feels himself getting relieved. His father is going away for a week. A fucking week. That means a week without abuse, a week without any pain and fear. For the first time in ages, Aidan is going to get some peace in his head. And, he can say yes to Dean’s offer. His father won’t be here for a week, he can go to Dean’s friends. He can finally do stuff. Even if it is just for a week.

* * *

 

Dean stares at his phone. He is confused. Utterly confused. Aidan just hung up at him, just like that. Why would he do that in the first place? Dean is worried as well. There were a lot of loud noises before Aidan had hung up and the Irishman sounded scared as hell. It was like something from the death had just woken up and broken into his house. And Dean is worried as hell. Really, really worried. What if Aidan is seriously getting hurt right now? All those answers, Dean doesn’t believe any of it. That idea of someone hurting Aidan is still playing in his head and this is definitely not making it any better. And Aidan having to lie to him about it, makes the feeling only even stronger. Aidan has trouble, he has problems, and Dean knows it. If he could only figure out what it is so he could help his friend. Because he really wants to help out Aidan. He wants to have him happy, without any worries. He sighs, having his mind get the better of him again. He puts his phone back on his place and lies down on his back. He stares at the ceiling for a while before falling asleep, getting tired of his mind.

The next morning, Dean wakes up early in the morning. It is work day again today. Away with the freedom, back to the restaurant. Not that you hear him complain though, Dean likes his work. Working with Richard is great and having happy costumers around is nice. It keeps him happy and energetic as well.

He lets himself slide out of bed and finds some comfortable and decent clothes. He yawns and shuffles to the kitchen. There he gets himself some coffee and sits down at the kitchen table, too lazy to make some breakfast and grabs an apple. He takes a bite out of it and hears Luke walking in. He turns around, nods at him and says: “Morning, Luke. Had a good night?” Luke huffs and Dean frowns at him.

“Good night? You kept me up the entire time with your phone call! Who called you at that ridiculous time?!” Luke exclaims, grabbing a mug to get some coffee as well. Dean lets out a laugh and says: “Mate, don’t over react. I bet you weren’t sleeping anyway. It wasn’t even that late.” Luke moves his mouth up a bit and mumbles: “Don’t care.” Dean chuckles and says: “You won’t believe who it was.” Luke frowns and grabs stuff to make a sandwich. He slightly turns to Dean and asks: “Who?” Dean waits with answering for a bit and says: “Aidan.”

Luke quickly spins around, now done with his sandwich. He takes a bite out of it and with a full mouth, he exclaims: “Whot? Awidan?!” Dean’s face turns into a glare of disgust as he snaps: “Disgusting, Luke. Don’t speak with your mouth full.” Luke shrugs, “Sworry.”

He sits down and swallows the piece of sandwich he had in his mouth. He stares at Dean and says: “So, Aidan called you. And? What was it like? Was it good?” Dean nods and says: “It actually went kind of weird because Aidan kept on stuttering and stuff.” Luke grins: “Not that unexpected, really. Talked about anything specific?” Dean sighs and says: “There was one thing, yes. When Aidan left yesterday, I saw some stuff. And I don’t think I was supposed to see it, but I did. It were, like, I saw bruises and cuts on his body.”

Luke’s eyes slightly widen and go back to normal before he asks: “Bruises?” Dean nods and says: “Yeah, and I asked him where he got those. He just stutters out something to me, but I don’t believe him. He made up excuses, I know it. And I don’t understand why.” Luke sighs and takes a sip from his coffee, “Well, people lie when they don’t want you to know the truth.” “No shit, Sherlock.” Dean scoffs. Luke rolls his eyes and says: “What I mean, is that the truth is probably hard on him. Because whatever happened to him, it must have been pretty serious and I don’t think he is willing or ready to talk about that. Yet. Maybe he will someday.”

“Wauw, you have gotten rather poetic these days, haven’t you?” Dean falls back into his chair, crossing his eyes. Luke shrugs and says: “It’s in my nature, Deano. I’m a writer.” Dean laughs and looks at the clock. He jumps up and says: “But anyway, I need to leave. Don’t want to be late.” “Alright. I need to go as well anyway. Wanna go together?” Luke stands up as well and Dean smiles.

He has said nothing about the loud bang at the end and Aidan getting scared as hell. Purposely, he wants to figure it himself before things get out of hand. Aidan seems to get comfortable around him and he wants to just help him out, without getting other people involved. Because, heck, he isn't so sure about Aidan liking that very much. If anything is even playing in his life.

The two clean up their breakfast and start getting ready. They grab their stuff and are out the door right after Dean gave Batman his food.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am really sorry for this chapter, but like I said, next one will be better. Thanks for reading! :) x


	10. Time to Explain (no chapter)

Hi everyone... First of all, I want to say how sorry I am for not updating for like a month or so. I feel so guilty about it and every time I think 'Hell, time to update the next chapter' something comes in between it and I just can't find the time to do it. My school life is very hectic at the moment and my teachers seem to think school is the only think in my life. They don't think about how I have a life outside books and studying and I truly hate them for doing this to me. I have to finish like four books and I have to study for so many tests, it is driving me insane:(

That's basically the reason of why I haven't updated anything this month. And like I said before, I feel so bad about it:( Guys, please don't think I have abandoned this story in any way. Because no, I really want to finish this work and play with all of my characters. I have never gotten this much support for a story before and I am so thankful for all of your patience souls:) I seriously adore and love you for all of this and once again, thank you.

But, here comes the good news...

Next week I have a break! Yay! 7 days of freedom! Which means I have plenty of time to write:) I am very happy about that and I hope you will be too!

And if you are wondering about the girl in the gif, she is only my female crush. Her name is Amber and she is the queen of everything. I may or may not have gotten into Kpop recently, and she is in the first Kpop group I loved, F(x). So, yeah, Kpop artists are simply the best... Sorry, I just really needed to say this... Yeah.

But, I really needed to make this small update, just so you guys would be informed about everything:) I love you! :)

 

_(This is just too hot) I just hope I can make it up with showing you this hottie;) x_

 


	11. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lying in my bed, don’t know what to do  
> I told my Best friend all about you  
> It’s quarter past twelve, I can’t get no sleep  
> I can almost hear, my heart beat so deep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELL YES! Finally the tenth chapter, everybody! Chapter ten! Can you believe it? I can't. I am so happy with this and I can't thank everybody enough for sticking around and understanding:) I have gotten so many nice comments and I love you all! So, after what seems like ages, here is the next chapter! Enjoy! :D

_It’s raining. It’s raining a lot. Small drops of water splash against the window, which blocks the way inside. Wind is blowing and sends the drops into the direction of the small cottage. The wind is strong, you can hear the whispers inside. The rain is loud and does not go unnoticed to the ones who can’t see the rain._

_Dean finds himself laying on a soft bed. Fuzzy and white pillows are surrounding him and a soft, green blanket is covering the lower parts of his body. He looks up and sees he is in a wooden cottage. Seeing the top of a couple of trees, Dean reasons he must be in a forest. He looks away from the window and looks more into the cottage. There is a small wooden table near the door. A fireplace is warming up the room. In front of the warm fire lays a dog. Dean focuses a bit more on the dog and recognizes him as Batman._

_“Bat?” Dean whispers confused. He wants to stand up to get to him but he suddenly feels the presence of someone else. A warm body is pressed against his chest and he looks down. His breath hitches when he recognizes the black curls._

_Aidan is sleeping. He is curled up against Dean, having his head resting on his chest. Dean feels like exploding and keeps on staring at the guy against him. He looks gorgeous, Dean thinks. He looks absolutely beautiful. Why would such a beautiful guy sleep right next to him?_

_Dean feels movements and his eyes slightly widen. Aidan’s eyes open and Dean is met with the most beautiful eyes he has ever seen. Aidan is looking up at him and cracks a somewhat sleepy smile. He snuggles against Dean and closes his eyes again. Dean is far from complaining and wraps his arm around Aidan, seeing Aidan is very comfortable with the touches. Aidan hums out of satisfaction and moves his head up again, to look at Dean._

_“Dean, I, I love you.” Aidan whispers and looks down, blushing heavily. Dean’s eyes widen and he feels his body heating up. His heart starts racing and he looks at Aidan, who is doing everything he can to avoid eye contact with Dean. His cheeks are slightly pink and he is biting his lip. Dean’s lips curl up into a smile and he gently places his hand under Aidan’s chin. He lifts his head up and Aidan looks at Dean._

_“Aid, I, I love you too.” Dean whispers and moves in. Aidan closes his eyes and lays down. Dean moves along with him and wraps his arm around Aidan’s waist. He places his free hand next to Aidan and bends down further and further. He feels soft lips pressed against his and starts deepening the kiss. He places his free hand under Aidan’s head and closes his eyes._

_He starts hearing someone calling his name vaguely but he ignores it completely. Nothing is going to ruin this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity._

_“Dean!” Dean groans annoyed but keeps focused on Aidan._

_“Dean! Dean!”_

“DEAN!”

Dean’s eyes fly open and he falls backwards. He is sitting on a stool and he is soon met with the wooden ground of the kitchen. He hears laughter behind him and sighs. He groans and pushes himself up, rubbing his nose.

He turns around and finds Richard and Luke standing next to each other, laughing like no tomorrow. Luke is leaning on the table, laughing loudly with a couple of hiccups. Richard has got one arm wrapped around his stomach. His left hand is covering his mouth and his shoulders are shaking. His eyes are closed and Dean can just hear his giggles and snickers.

“Yeah, yeah. I get it! What’s so funny?” Dean asks annoyed, yet confused because he has no idea what’s going on. Luke pushes himself up and Richard tries to calm himself down. Luke takes the place next to Richard and looks at Dean, clearly trying to keep the laughter inside. He is failing miserably.

“Why were you kissing the sugar?” Luke eventually asks, immediately falling back into a fit of laughter with Richard. Dean frowns confused and stares at them, asking: “What?” Richard wipes his eyes and says: “You were in the kitchen for way too long and I wanted to see what you were doing. When I got here, you were kissing the sugar jar.” Luke snickers and adds: “Yeah, and for as far as I could tell, you were enjoying it.” Dean’s eyes widen and he stutters: “I-I was-I was-”

“You were sleeping, we know. But that’s one thing we don’t do on the job.” Richard lets out one snickers and within the fraction of a second he goes from laughter to seriousness. He sends a sceptic frown at Dean and the blond man looks down in shame. First they find him making out with sugar and then Richard has to scold him in front of Luke. Great. What a great day.

“I’m aware of that, Richard. It won’t happen again.” Dean says, looking up again. Luke is laughing silently behind Richard and wiggles with his eyebrows. Dean sends him a deadly glare and Luke just sticks out his tongue. Richard’s glance relaxes a bit and he sighs: “Don’t let me catch you kissing other stuff, alright? Get back to work. Customers are waiting.” Dean’s cheeks go red and Richard walks out of the kitchen again.

Once Richard is gone, Luke lets out all of the laughs and looks at Dean, saying: “What’s next? The potatoes?” “Oh, fuck off. I wasn’t even awake.” Dean snaps, sitting back on the stool. He leans on the table and Luke sits down next to him, grabbing the free stool.

“Were you dreaming about Aidan, perhaps?” Luke grabs an apple out of a box and takes a bite out of it. Dean is quiet for a second. He _was_ dreaming about Aidan. But, it all seemed so real. The cottage, the loud rain, Batman. The kiss… Aidan telling him he loved him…

Love. He had told Aidan he loved him as well. Does he though? He can’t love Aidan, he hasn’t spent enough time with the man to do that. He doesn’t know him long enough to do that. But why did he dream about it then? And why did Aidan say the same? Does something deep inside of him want to hear that from him? Maybe, yes, maybe one day. When everything goes right. That being him and Aidan ending up together.

But how come he already dreams of it? This never happens. His own thoughts, confusing him more than anything else could.

Dean looks at Luke, who is impatiently waiting for Dean to answer. He is chewing on the apple, something Richard won’t be happy about. He is eating one of the ingredients and Richard already hates it when Dean steals small chocolate bars. “Those are for the guests and not for hungry dogs such as you and Luke.” Of course, this was meant in the most loving way possible.

Dean lets out a sigh and says: “I, I guess I was.” Luke spits out the apple piece and exclaims: “I knew it! You are not just crushing on Aidan, you are in love with him! You are in love with Aidan!” Dean immediately grabs Luke’s arms and pushes him down, back on the stool.

“Can you freaking keep it down?! Fine, yes, but it is not love! Not yet.” Dean looks at Luke but the glare won’t ever go  away. Luke is smirking and wiggling with his eyebrows. “Oh, knock it off, will you?” Dean snaps annoyed, hitting him on the back of his eyes. Luke doesn’t seem bothered by it and asks: “And?” Dean sighs, “And what?” “Was Aidan a good kisser?” “Fuck off, you!” Dean exclaims and gets up. Luke laughs and gets up as well.

“Why won’t you answer such a simple question?” Luke snickers and Dean pushes him towards the door, saying: “Out. You are distracting me.” Luke quickly turns around and says: “Dean, tell me when you’ve gone further with the sugar, alright? I want to know it all.” “OUT!” Dean exclaims and pushes him through the doors.

* * *

 

Emptiness. Aidan is met with emptiness as soon as he opens his eyes. They more or less flutter open. It doesn’t happen in one fraction of a second, it goes very slowly. Have you ever seen a camel opening his eyes? Yes? It doesn’t go that fast. And that’s the way Aidan’s eyes opened. He looks around him from the cold spot on the ground. It is very cold. Even though  there are no windows, there is fresh air going through the room.

He pushes his body up and feels his lower back aching. Laying on a stone ground in cold air is definitely not good for your health. That’s for sure. But Aidan is trying not to complain. The life he lives with his dad really changes your view on other stuff. Like complaining about pain. He feels numb when  others feel like going through hell. He knows it is bad, but he can’t change much about it though. Although he wishes he could because this is not the way he wants to live his life.

He rubs his eyes and yawns a couple of times. He stretches his arms and looks around him. He tries to listen to the sounds around him. He focuses on the noises outside of the basement. His father should be up by now. He is always awake early. But even though he awakes before the first light, he is lazy during the day. He mainly sleeps and that really bothers Aidan. He’d rather have the man stay in bed all day instead of waking up at 6 in the morning and waking him up in the roughest way possible.

And then it hits him. His father. He would go away today. He would leave him alone for a week. He could go with Dean..

A sudden strike of adrenaline shots to him and Aidan pushes himself up. He more or less limps to the door due to all of the bruises on his body. It is aching but Aidan ignores it. Or at least tries to ignore it as much as possible.

He reaches the door and waits for a second. If his father has left the door on its lock, his happiness would have been for nothing. As usual. He doesn’t want to be met with disappointment and takes a deep breath. The sudden burst of energy is already gone and he expects nothing but the worst. He reaches his hand out for the knob and closes his eyes. He feels the cold metal and turns it. The click changes his mood immediately again.

The door is open. The door is really open. Either his dad doesn’t want him to starve to death or he simply forgot to lock it again.

Aidan opens his eyes and a very small smile appears on his face. He slowly pulls the door open and is met by a lot of light coming from the kitchen, hall and living room. It is a bright light and even though he does not know the time, he knows it must be near midday or it is already midday. Aidan doesn’t really care though, he is happy enough about the fact that he is able to move and eat and just finally live a little. Just a little, because really living the life is for him not an option. And it won’t ever be. At least, that is what is going through Aidan’s mind.

He looks behind him and sends one last glare to the basement. In a week he will be back but for now he can say goodbye to it and that makes Aidan very, very happy.  He moves out of the dark room and steps inside the hall. He slowly closes the door behind him and looks up. It is freezing cold, his father never turns on the heat when he is gone.

 Aidan takes his phone out of his pocket and checks the time. 11:50 AM. It’s rather late for Aidan. He is used to being up at 6 due to his father. He feels like singing a Disney song at the moment, the freedom is too much for him to handle.

He walks over to the kitchen and gets himself a proper breakfast. He pulls a chair backwards and sits down on it. He grabs his phone again and goes to his contacts. He hovers his finger over to Dean, but pulls back almost immediately. He can’t do it. He doesn’t have enough courage to do it. He was so sure about it yesterday. So sure about it. He would call Dean and tell him he can go out. But now, it is all gone. It sucked out of him like a vacuum and he feels insecure about it again.

He sighs frustrated and locks his phone. He focuses back on his food and takes a deep breath out of his nose. He stares out of the window and hears a raven. Ravens are his favourite birds and very easy for him to recognize. He doesn’t know how he managed to recognize it, but he did. The sound isn’t as beautiful as an eagle but to him it is just as beautiful.

He sees a raven flying across the window and cracks another smile. It is a beautiful animal. Its wings are pitch black and he’s got shining eyes. The bird is free. Free to go wherever he wants to go. Free to do what he wants to do. And sometimes, sometimes Aidan just wishes he was a raven. Having a free life for not just a short time, but forever. And that’s something Aidan wishes to have more than ever.

He looks away from the window and takes the last bite out of the sandwich in front of him. He stands up and places the plate in the sink. He leans with his hands a bit over the sink, having his thick curls fall in front of his face. Aidan just can’t seem to progress it all. The last time he experienced what it was like to live in peace and freedom was right before his mother died. Which is already a very long time ago. He is not used to these kind of circumstances. But Aidan is planning on not going to adjust either. His father will be back in a week time, perhaps even sooner. What use would it be if he starts to get used to freedom? It will be ripped away from him almost immediately again.

Aidan lets out a deep breath and turns around. It is still freezing. There is even frost forming on the window, despite the fact that it is midday and everything but winter.

He pushes himself away from the counter and walks over to the table to grab his phone. He tries going over to Dean’s number again, but he just can’t do it. He is too afraid Dean won’t like it. Dean wouldn’t understand why he changed his mind that fast and ask questions. And Aidan just can’t tell him the reasons. Dean would be angry at him for lying about his life and he can’t have that. He just can’t have Dean hate him too.

He sighs and puts the phone in his back pocket. He makes his way to the living room and tries to find the radiator. It is hidden rather well and Aidan has trouble finding it in all the mess. There are empty beer bottles piling up next to the big and comfortable chair from his father, dirty laundry is creating a nasty smell, there is dust everywhere and everywhere you look you can find leftovers of any kind of food. It’s really disgusting, but Aidan can live it. He’s done it all of his life and even though he thinks of it as really gross, he has gotten used to it. Though, he’d really wants to clean it up one time. But just the thought of bending down hurts and his entire body is broken. He shouldn’t do stuff like that.

After a long time, Aidan finally spots the radiator but all of a sudden he is too scared to turn up the heat. His father doesn’t have a job and neither does he. They don’t have money. His father refuses to turn up the heat because the bills will get too much for him. If Aidan does it now, his dad will be furious. No, even worse. He will be completely gone. The thought of it scares Aidan to death and he immediately backs away.

He bites his lip and walks out of the room, rubbing his arms in order to keep himself warm. He sits down in the kitchen again and almost gets a heart attack when his pocket starts vibrating. He calms himself down once he realises it is his phone and grabs it.

It’s Adam. Adam is calling him. Aidan feels like smiling all over again, seeing his best friend’s name on the display. He quickly presses green phone and answers, “Adam?”

“ _Aidan! I’m so happy you’re answering your phone, mate. How are you?! I feel like we haven’t spoken in ages!”_

Adam’s cheerful voice comes from the other side and Aidan is happy to call him a friend. No matter what he does, Adam knows how to talk to him and how to cheer him up. And that’s something Aidan can appreciate more than anything.

“I-I’m doing fine, Adam. I-I’m alright.” Aidan wants to tell him about him being home alone, but he’d rather keep that information behind.

“ _That’s amazing to hear! Dude, I have some very great news. I am on my way to London right now!”_

Aidan’s heart stops for a second. Adam is coming to London? He is finally going to see him again? But, Adam can’t do that. He probably wants to see his house and where he lives. Aidan can’t do that to him. Not to Adam and not to himself.

“W-what?! A-are you r-really?” Aidan asks in a rather loud voice. It is still more or less a whisper, but this is loud for Aidan.

“ _Yes! I know, I should have told you, but you never answer you calls. But I am in a train and nearly there. Oh, and don’t worry about where I’ll be staying, I’ve booked a room in this really nice hotel.”_

“T-that’s g-great, Adam. W-when will you be here?” Aidan asks, making movements to get up. He has got to be there when Adam comes. He wants to be there. He needs to be there.

“ _Eh, well, according to a creepy old lady we’ll be there in 20 minutes.”_

20 minutes. Aidan has got 20 minutes to make his way over to the train station. He doesn’t even care about the way he looks, he now has a reason to go outside.

“A-alright. I’ll make s-sure I’m there.” Aidan says and he can just see the big smile on Adam’s face.

_“Will you?! Mate, you’re the best! But he, I need to hang up now. Someone just gave me food.”_

Aidan lets out a small laugh and Adam cuts off the line. Aidan puts the phone back into his pocket and walks as fast as he can to the hallway. He grabs a jacket and puts it on. He cringes a lot whiles doing it but he tries to ignore all of it. Again. Aidan suddenly realises that the train station is about 40 minutes away from his house. He first would have to get out of the middle of nowhere and then go- the train station is literally around the corner of the restaurant where Dean works. He would see Dean.

Aidan slowly buttons up the jacket, realising he would probably see Dean. He doesn’t know what to do now. He will be late and see Dean at the same time. He doesn’t know how Dean will react when he sees him. Will he be angry? Cheerful? Aidan does not know and he starts feeling nervous all over again.

* * *

 

Dean places a plate with two sandwiches on a table and after getting paid, he walks back to the counter to put the money where it belongs. He cleans his hands and walks over to the other side of the counter. Luke is still here and not planning on moving either. He is working on his laptop on some story.

Dean puts a cup right next to the laptop and Luke looks up. He smiles at Dean and says: “You are too good for me.” Dean frowns, “Yeah? Well, you won’t move and I have this feeling you won’t do anything today.” Luke laughs and wiggles his eyebrows. “Stop doing that!” Dean exclaims and hits Luke on his arm. Luke acts like if he is in pain and Dean just rolls his eyes.

The small *ding* from the door gets Dean to focus back on his job. A young man walks in. He is wearing glasses and has got a big bag with him. He is wearing a simple jacket and has got his phone in his hands.

The man walks over to the counter and Dean says, “Welcome to Richard’s, sir. How can I help you?” The man looks at the menu and says: “A simple coffee is enough for me.” Hearing the accent, Dean knows the man is not from London. Or anything around it.

“I’m sorry, but you are not from here, are you?” Dean asks, getting a cup for the coffee. The man shakes his head and says: “No, you’re right. I’m from Ireland. This is more like a holiday to see a friend again.” Dean frowns, “Ireland? How interesting. I’ve got a friend from Ireland but his accent is a bit different.” The man laughs and says: “Yeah, that could be right. It’s just like here in England, no accent is the same.” Dean smiles and says: “Well, I hope you’ll enjoy your vacation. Here is the coffee.” The man smiles back and says: “Thank you.” Dean looks into the kitchen for a moment and turns back to the man, asking: “Do you want to pay now or after you’re done?”                                    

The man is about to answer but slightly turns his body to shot a glare outside first. His eyes widen when he sees another guy walking outside. That guy is looking lost and frustrated at the same time. But the man in the restaurant doesn’t even care.

“AIDAN!”  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any idea who this mysterious dude could be? I think you know;) I hope you liked it! :D xx


	12. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To see you hurt  
> To see you cry  
> Makes me weep  
> And wanna die  
> And if you agree  
> To never fight  
> It wouldn't matter  
> Who's wrong or right  
> If a broken heart  
> Needs a mend  
> I'll be right there  
> Till the end
> 
> (Source: http://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/poem-about-friends-for-life#ixzz3NZfu7YIu  
> Family Friend Poems)

Aidan moves his body up to look into the direction of the sudden voice. He knows that voice, he would recognize it any time. That is the voice that gave him comfort when needed, that made him laugh, made him cry, made him forget about everything else. It is the voice from the only person who was ever willing to be his friend.

He looks through the windows of Dean’s restaurant and his eyes widen when he sees it is in fact Adam. The Adam, he stands right there, next to Dean. Dean himself is looking quite confused, but amused at the same time.

“Adam…” Aidan whispers and pushes the door open to get inside the restaurant. He makes his way over to the man, who is smiling as bright as the sun. Adam pushes himself away from the counter and rushes over to Aidan.

“Adam!” Aidan breathes out as Adam launches himself at him. The smaller man wraps his arms tightly around Aidan and Aidan does exactly the same. He buries his face into Adam’s neck and feels like crying all over again. Adam pulls him closer and whispers, “It’s alright, Aidan, I’m here now. No need to be afraid any longer.”

Dean watches from a small distance and looks at how Adam comforts Aidan. It is an Aidan he has never seen before. Aidan, who clinches himself to the younger man, like he doesn’t want to lose him. Again. Aidan, who looks like he is seriously about to cry. Aidan who looks like he is in another world.

Whenever Aidan is around him, Dean knows he is uncomfortable or getting shy. He doesn’t blame him, they just know each other and are slowly getting friends. Dean is still trying to get Aidan out of the awkward and uncomfortable zone, but is going slow. Aidan is unsure about trusting him and Dean doesn’t know why. He has done so much yet Aidan still doesn’t trust him. At least, that’s how it feels.

But Dean feels like he can’t blame the younger man. He has trouble he hasn’t told him about, but Dean knows that are there. And all he wants, is to help Aidan with his problems. If only he gives in and tells him those, Dean can help him. But, of course, Dean has no idea what’s it like having to deal with such things. Hence he doesn’t push Aidan in telling them. He wants to give Aidan that feeling that allows him to feel comfortable around him.

Just like Adam does.

Dean sees Adam whispering something in Aidan’s ear and Aidan nods. Adam walks over to Dean, leaning a bit over the counter.

“Mate, is there a possibility that me and Aidan can have some private time somewhere over here?” Adam asks in a low voice. Dean looks over at Aidan, who is sniffling and avoiding eye contact with everyone, including Dean.

He nods and says: “Sure, I’ll bring you to it. Hang on.” He walks around the counter, up to Aidan. He looks at him and asks: “Aid, do you want some alone time with your friend?” Aidan looks at him with a mixture of relief and gratefulness, saying: “Y-yeah, t-thanks, Dean.” Dean smiles at him and looks back at Adam, saying: “Come on.”

Adam and Aidan follow Dean to the back of the restaurant, through the kitchen. Behind this kitchen is another room: the office. Richard is out celebrating his anniversary with Lee and left the business to Dean, hence the office is empty. There is enough space for the two men to talk and an open window for fresh air. Something Aidan really seems to need.

Dean lets the two guys in and says, “Richard, my boss, is gone so you two can have a calm conversation. Let me know when you need something, alright? I need to get back to work.” Adam nods and says, “Thank you, Dean. That’s very kind of you.” Aidan looks at the ground and shyly nods along with what Adam says. You can barely see it, but for Dean it is clear enough.

He smiles and says, “No problem.” He steps out of the office and closes the door. He waits before he actually starts walking back to the restaurant. He takes a deep breath and turns around to take a last look at the door.

He wonders what is happening behind that red, wooden door right now. He really wants to know, but he is not the one to spy and ear drop on them. They need their privacy and Dean respects that. Even though the urge to sneak back at the door and put his ear on the wood is big, Dean keeps himself calm and takes another deep breath. Those two have some serious issues they need to deal with. Adam maybe not so big, but Aidan for sure.

Dean sighs and walks away, quickly wiping away some dust from a frying pan.

~~

Adam watches as the door closes and turns back to Aidan, who can’t stop staring at his shoes. Adam sighs and a smile creeps on his face. He walks up to Aidan and gently grabs the younger man’s chin. Aidan looks at him with watery eyes and Adam doesn’t need more to encourage him. He throws his arms around Aidan and hugs him like no tomorrow.

Aidan immediately reacts, finally having that familiar comfort back. Adam is one of a few, heck, the only one, who can just hug Aidan. He knows Aidan first needs to see him before actually making contact, but that’s the whole trick. Aidan doesn’t flinch nor shrinks away whenever Adam puts his arms around him. Not when it is a simple arm around the shoulder and not when it is a firm bear-like hug like the one he is giving him right now. It just feels right to Aidan.

Aidan hides his face in the crock of Adam’s neck and starts crying all over again. He managed to keep it together when Dean was there, but now he lets it all out. He doesn’t want Dean to see him cry. Not again. He feels like Dean will pity him or judge him. Dean hasn’t done that at all though, but Aidan still feels that sense around him.

Aidan hates to admit it, but he feels like he is ugly when he cries. He feels like he is ugly most of the time, but especially when he cries. And he doesn’t want to look extra ugly, not in front of Dean. He likes Dean and now he seriously acknowledges it, he might as well like him a lot. Like, a lot. He hasn’t like anyone so much before since he met Adam.

Although he likes Adam in a non-romantic way, there was no one else in his life who gave him weird feelings. Adam just makes him happy, but Dean, Dean manages to make him feel things. Things that confuse and scare him. Dean gives him the feeling like there are a thousand baby butterflies flying through his stomach. He gives him the feeling like he is filled with air and can fly away any time.

All Aidan wants, is for Dean to feel the same for him. To feel like Aidan makes him fly or gives him baby butterflies. That’s why he hates to look ugly in front of him. But Aidan feels like Dean will never feel the same way about him. Aidan is not worth it, Dean definitely deserves a better person. Someone who doesn’t need to cry every 5 minutes, someone who is mentally stable and above all, capable of being loved and giving love.

Aidan feels like he can’t give Dean the love he needs. Little does he know that Dean feels the exact same way about him.

Adam, in the meantime, tightens his arms around Aidan. He missed the scent of him, the feel of his jacket. Adam missed everything about Aidan. He missed having the big guy around to just talk to and mess around with. Aidan wasn’t always the most talkative and happy-go-lucky people, but Adam can respect it and feels like he should take care of him. Since he is away, Adam feels like his purpose of life has left with Aidan. It sounds really stupid, but Adam is serious about it.

Adam pulls away from Aidan and looks at him. Aidan is crying and Adam looks around for a tissue or something to wipe away the tears. There are none so Adam just uses his hands. He takes Aidan’s face into his hands and wipes away the wet tears from his face with his thumbs. “Don’t cry, Aid, it’s alright. You are alright.” Adam whispers and Aidan closes his eyes, leaning into the touch of Adam’s hands. Adam smiles and gently grabs Aidan’s arm to pull him over to the two chairs in the back of the office.

He gently pushes Aidan on a chair and sits down on the other chair himself. Adam grabs Aidan’s hand and says, “I missed you so much, you know that right? I felt like a part of me left.” Aidan lets out a giggle and covers his mouth with hand immediately.

Adam softly laughs and says, “Don’t be ashamed, you used to giggle the entire time when you still lived in Ireland. I kind of missed the sound of it, mate.”

Aidan slowly removes his hand and grins a little awkwardly. He looks at Adam and asks, “D-did you really miss me that m-much?” Adam eagerly nods and says, “Hell yeah. It is so damn dull and boring with having my best friend around. It has changed, you know.” Aidan looks at him and Adam continues.

“Yeah, your old home has been sold to an old couple. They are sweet people but they are so bad at remembering things. They forget everything and that makes them fight most of the time. They simply forget that the other did something.” Adam says and the annoyance in his voice makes Aidan laugh a little. This is the Adam how he knows him, full of character and always complaining about everything.

“And those annoying people from around the corner have started so many rumors about why you left. Said that your dad found a rich woman to marry and get rich. Oh, and there is one that says that your dad is doing business in illegal prostitution in Japan and needed a place where he can deal in it in peace and quiet. How dumb can you be? That’s not something you say about other people.” Adam says and Aidan turns quiet. Those things could be what he wishes the reason was why they moved.

Unfortunately for him, the real reason is because his dad is too abusive and doesn’t want people to find out about it. It is disgusting actually and Aidan wants to beg for Adam to take him back. But then he needs to explain about his dad and that is the last thing he wants to do.

He knows Adam suspects something, but abuse even goes behind the older boy’s borders and Aidan is too scared to tell him. He might call the cops and his dad will get arrested. That sounds like a good thing, but once the man will be out of jail, Aidan can meet the death right away. He is scared his dad will seriously kill him for it. He already nearly killed him in his beatings, this one could be on purpose and Aidan wants to avoid it from happening.

“Aidan?”

Aidan blinks a couple of times before moving his head up. His eyes meet Adam’s, who is looking very concerned at him. There it goes again, the concern from Adam. Aidan really hates it when Adam looks at him like that. He feels like he has failed his friend, like he saddened him. That is something Aidan never wants to do. Adam should not have to deal with his pain and needs to stay the happy toddler he is.

Aidan fakes a smile and says, “I-I’m fine, sorry, I drifted off.” Adam doesn’t seem to believe him but leaves Aidan be. In times like these, it is better not to go on about it. Aidan could shut down completely or break out in sweat. Adam had done it one time and one time too many. He doesn’t need that to happen again.

“Alright, as long as you’re alright it’s fine. But we have so much to catch on with. I don’t know what to start with.” Adam says and starts thinking on what to say.

Aidan smiles at the older guy and looks out the window. Somehow Dean’s smile creeps into his thoughts but Aidan doesn’t ignores it. He smiles and starts thinking about Dean’s smile more than listening to Adam.

~~

Dean tries to keep his attention on the job, but his thought keep on drifting off to Adam and Aidan. It bothers him not knowing what they are doing in there. Is Adam Aidan’s boyfriend? It can’t be, Aidan doesn’t look like the one to date Adam, the aura around them seemed more a deep friendship than a relationship. And, Aidan has never mentioned a boyfriend before.

At least, that’s what Dean is trying to tell himself. He actually doesn’t want Aidan to have a boyfriend. Of course, he looks so happy around him but Dean likes Aidan himself a lot. He likes him so much that he wants to be Aidan’s boyfriend. If someone else is dating the one person he actually likes, he is done for it.

Dean thinks of himself as selfish, only thinking about his own happiness. But he can’t help it.

Then again, when Aidan is happy, then so is Dean. Even if that should mean that Aidan dates someone else.

But besides this, Dean also wants to know what the heck they are talking about. How long haven’t they seen each other? How well do they know each other? Are they best friends? Do they go to the same piano lesson? So many questions but so many answers needed as well.

For some reason, Dean feels like he should be there with them. Just, to make sure Aidan is alright. Adam clearly knows him a lot longer than he does, but Dean feels like he needs to protect Aidan from everyone and everything. Aidan is fragile, very fragile and Dean doesn’t want him to get hurt. Not in any way.

Dean sighs and shrieks when a pair of fingers snap in front of him. He looks up and finds Richard standing in front of him, frowning. Lee is sat on one of the chairs at the window and playing God knows what on his phone.

“Dean! I leave the restaurant to you for one day and you’re already sleeping?” Richard snaps and sighs. Dean laughs a little sheepishly and scratches behind his head. Lee looks up at them in amusement and laughs a little when he sees the two. Richard is looking at Dean in a very judgmental way and Dean looks like he wants to run away right on the spot.

“I only drifted off just now, I swear. I was awake for the rest of the day.” Dean says and Richard rolls his eyes, “I suppose I need to believe you now and for your sake I will. How did the business go?” Dean shrugs and says, “The usual. Why are you back by the way? Shouldn’t you two be making out on a beach or something right now?”

Richard resists the urge to slap Dean right now and says, “If you look outside, you’ll see the weather is fucked up and all our plans were thrown away.” Dean grins but stops when he sees Richard’s glare. Lee notices as well and gets up. He walks up to Richard and gives him a kiss on his cheek. “Baby, calm down. Dean just has fun, just like we had during the day. Where is this short temper coming from all of a sudden?” Lee asks and Richard sighs, not being able to resists Lee’s eyes.

“I’m sorry, I am just pissed off that I didn’t get to spend my day with you like I planned.” Richard says and strokes Lee’s cheek. Dean coughs and says, “Keep it PG, there is a minor right here.”

Richard bites his lip to stop himself from screaming and hisses, “Why are you being so annoying today? Go back to your work. I am going to my office.”

Dean drops the tissues he was planning on putting away and exclaims, “Stop! You can’t go in there.” Richard looks at him and snaps, “Oh, now you are forbidding me from going into my own office?”

Dean sighs and says, “No, but you remember Aidan? He met a long lost friend here today and they are having a bit of privacy in there.”

At the mention of Aidan’s name, Richard calms down. He can be angry all he want on Dean but not on Aidan. He doesn’t know the kid at all, but what he has heard from Dean, Aidan is a nice kid and Richard is not the one to disturb him.

“Fine, then I’ll sit right here. You go on with your job, but I’ll keep a close eye on you. Got it?” Richard looks at Dean and the younger immediately nods, getting a smile from Lee. Lee gets pulled away to a table and Dean is left alone once again.

Sort of, he can feel Richard’s eyes wandering over to him. He sighs and tries to focus on working. Only, he can’t really do that with Richard looking at him and Aidan in his mind. With his attention completely somewhere else, Dean puts the tissues into the dishwasher.

“Goddamn it, Dean!” 

* * *

 GUESS WHO'S BACK

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After a year of doing nothing and leaving this story in the dust, I am back again with a new chapter! I am so utterly sorry for doing this to all of you, but trust me, I did not intend on leaving it behind like this. No, I do not plan on not finishing this. I might take me forever to update, but I will finish this. No matter what.
> 
> I am sorry for the long wait, I just, I got busy. I planned on updating several times, I just never got to it. My life is complicated and full of stuff I hate doing. Such as social stuff. Again, I am so sorry. I'll make sure it won't ever happen again. I can't guarentee fast updates again, but there won't be a gap from a year again. Hell no. I am a poor excuse of a writer yes, but a year is even a little too much for me... I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless and will continue to support this story! Thanks for reading! :)


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